Mazuurek

I'd like to point out that the Chicago Manual of Style indicates that there is no problem in starting a sentence with conjunctions like "And" or "But", and that the ...

I didn't notice any paragraphs that were particularly long, save for that describing the girl. Then again, I suppose people have varying standards of long and short paragraphs. Actually, a ...

Thanks for the review! I'm glad when readers finish the story and ask questions, because that was my intention when writing the piece. Okay, not to ask questions, but rather ...

Thanks for the review! First off, thanks for pointing out the mistake with "wishful thinking". I never actually noticed. I'll be on the lookout for it in future writings! I ...

Thanks for the welcome and review~ The point about detachment is correct. I've gotten used to writing detached stories (mostly in the unnamed third person perspective too), and this story ...

Thank you for the review! You're correct on those two points for improvement. That piece of dialogue is a bit oddly arranged, and that paragraph could afford to be broken ...