Magnificent_Ego

Hello again, Pinata. As always, a largely stylistic critique--if something I have written does not ring true, as the writer you have every right to disregard it. The beginning of ...

Hello, Pinata. As always, most of my critique is purely stylistic, so if anything does not ring true to you, feel free to disregard. Your first paragraph is a fine ...

Hello, Kyte. If I'm not mistaken, all of my suggestions are purely stylistic, purely personal opinion. Feel free to disregard if they do not ring true to you. Initial impressions: ...

That was a rather crass remark, Mike. I believe that he means, Thanatos, is that in order to enable your reviewers to more easily read your work, you should double ...

Hello, Absynthe. Forgive me if my reviewing method is rather....methodical, but I prefer details to the larger picture. I will, of course, give you my overall opinion at the end ...

Disclaimer--this critique is purely stylistic. If you agree with the comments, use them. If not, do NOT take my opinion as law. On to the critique. ^_^ God has made ...

Merely as a stylistic point--Your dialogue, to me at least, detracts from the story. Both the manner in which it is written, and the words themselves, are rather broken. As ...