Lena.Wooldridge

Obviously, I have not read the other chapters, so I will be missing parts of the plot. I'll try to refrain from griping to much about apparent holes in the ...

The rule is sacrosanct I, for one, have no idea what sacrosanct means. I don't know anyone else who does, either. It'd be better if you tried "adamant" which, I'm ...

I had begged, pleaded Try just saying "I begged, pleaded....", it sounds much better without the "had" ;) ten minutes until the flight would board Instead of saying "until", use ...

on the night of the murder of Julius Caesar. Put a paragraph break after this, and do a : instead of a period. Also, I just read Julius Caesar, and ...

I logged of my laptop and pulled out my IPod Touch. Opening the new email, I whispered, "This may be it." This is what it said: Dear Liz, 12/13/08 Love, ...

Concentrate & relax This should be italicized and the & should be replaced with an "and". Those words were whispering in my mind. If you are writing in 3rd person, ...

Hey Layla :) Thanks for posting something so short, it makes it much easier to read and review! I turn over as I hear a loud ring, coming from our ...

Hey Michael :) Just wanted to say that you are an excellent writer. Don't take anything I say personally, I just want to give the kind of critiques that I ...

That’s the new girl, they whisper, what a loser. Their murmurs blow around the room like bubbles, popping secrets and then vanishing. Try italicizing the whispering parts, so it's like: ...

I honestly had no idea what was going on during this story. I just have no clue. I thought that, maybe, at the end of the story you would have ...