Kitkat_1122_

I agree with writersdomain; it seemed a little rushed. I couldn't really tell what the plot was, so maybe if you made your main character reflect her thoughts about the ...

Bold = what I'm trying to point out. For Me A manicured lawn Devoid of leaves Meets the summer dawn By Bapaume near Ypres. That looked odd to me the ...

I like the first stanza, I thought it was cool how you could rhyme and have the stanza still make sense and how it still related to your topic (I ...

The last two lines don't seem to fit to me. Like the way I see it is that you talk about a part of the statue and then describe kinda ...

I would sudgest that you add a pattern or rhyming scheme, that way it would seem less random, which to me it seemed just like you could read it as ...

One critique I have is that is instead of calling the steaks a "flock of steaks" you should call it something like the "steak storage" because the other way I ...

I like the idea (even though it is sad). You did a good job writing the first paragraph. I like your word choice such as: jeers, beckons (really like this ...