KayKel16

It was 7:00 o clock in the morning and the sun shone through the beautiful crystal windows in the living room. When giving time, it should look like this: Eight ...

Gosh, why did they invent Mondays, I thought drearily. Italicize 'Gosh, why did they invent Mondays'. It will separate those thoughts, from the others. "Aaaaw!" "No, I don't believe this!" ...

After a month or two instead of staying inside and talking he took me on a walk around town. Comma after talking. When we were almost getting to the gate ...

He smoothed out the sandy dirt that lay around him. He opened his eyes, and with great effort sat up. Can I recommend a rewrite of this sentence? If so, ...

"excuse me, but I need to check us in, so if you could move out of the way, that would be great." You need to capitalize excuse. Then after in, ...

"She should have been more careful; she should have paid more attention; she shouldn’t have gotten distra –" I don't think you should use semicolons as much as you have ...

“Two lasagnas and lemonade por favor,” Justin ordered for me. We’ve been here so many times in the years we’ve dated we even know most of the employees. Alright, here ...

I admit, I haven't read the story in which you switched to the father's POV. But this was really good and i found barely any issues with it. Except for ...

"Ana, do you mind carrying Adam into the house and getting settle?" my Aunt Kate said to me when I had arrived by stagecoach at her house Alright, settle should ...

So far I checked the bakery, all of the abandoned apartment buildings where his friends live, I have even checked the bakery! Nothing. I’ve also gone back home a couple ...

How could this have happened, she thought. Thoughts really should be itaclized from the rest of your writing. It lets your readers know its a thought and not just apart ...

James was completely and wholly in love with Regina, and now he had heart break to add to that. I think that heartbreak is one word. I don't know if ...

Friends and boys and school spirit passed around her like shadows. I'd like to see this sentence seperated by commas rather than and's, maybe like this? "Friends, boys, and school ...

She moved with agility, grace and slender that no human could possibly achieve, and so quiet were her footsteps that the dust rising beneath her feet was the only warning ...

I spotted a view grammar mistakes like this one: My Dad looked as unhappy as he had looked when he had finally given Misty the credit card that accessed his ...