Juniper

Hey there, I’m June, There are strong points to this story, such as the narrator’s cool, laid-back tone of voice. I like the brevity of the piece, too, and I ...

Reading over this story, I got the feeling that these two (presumably young) women are strong, independent, and fearless. You did a good job translating their characters over to us ...

Howdy, Panda, I’m June! Seeing as your prior reviewers have beautifully hit the nail on the head, I'll cut to the chase: I think what you have here is the ...

Hi LowriGrace, I’m June, I really enjoyed this piece. I think you did a great job capturing the sense of someone longing for her brother’s absence, and I especially love ...

Hey pensword, Juniper here. :) I love a good story about ships, sailors, and the sea, and the tone you’ve set forth reminds me of Leslie Turner White’s Lord Johnnie ...

Hey! June here again, I don’t feel like this chapter is as strong as your first. I think there’s just as much of a story here and it’s all as ...

Hi Robbie, June here, More often than not, I find myself telling young writers to “show, don’t tell” a story because straightforward narration quickly becomes laborious, but here, you told ...

Hi Willow, I’m June, I think this is an interesting concept-- a stillborn child growing up on the outside of a proper life is not an idea I’ve seen before, ...

Hi Yazi, I’m June. Let’s take a look at this, shall we? :) The beginning of your story is your one-time only chance to grab your reader’s interest. You start ...

The opening of this story is cute, but it doesn’t particularly grab my attention. Your opening paragraph overdoes the idea of pride in the narrator’s work, and whatever interest of ...

Hi, Ignorance, June here, I have a soft spot for adapted stories, and I think you did rather well with this piece. You have a clean, concise storytelling style that ...

Hi there, I'm June, She is on the grass, having a shade from her summer hat while facing the lake that reflects the view around and above it. "having a ...

Hi HaleyPenguin, I'm June, To me, this read more like a diary entry of wishes rather than a story. I want to go back to the times where there wasn't ...

Hi Lyssiekins, I’m June, I feel like this short story has potential, but I don’t feel like your language is delivering your message as strongly as you could. To begin: ...

Hey there! In a few hours, throngs of starving souls were going to turn the dim, undisturbed roo m, he stood in, i nto one of the busiest restaurants in ...