Jiggity

She’d jump out of her fancy car everyday with a smile on her face, wave at the car and wouldn’t stop until it disappeared from her view and ran straight ...

PROLOGUE In an ordinary world, through an ordinary town, in which there was an ordinary street, there walked a…not so ordinary woman. Short in stature, she had a sturdy frame ...

there to find a unique power handed down through her line since time immemorial I altered that a little, but Im not sure exactly what it is that was cliched ...

Yeah, way to smash down our critique with sound reasoning. My complaint about the song was to do with the fact that the reader couldnt be sure about wether:“Noooooooooooow you ...

You'll have to wait a moment. Im currently writing the next part of my story Shaman. While I do that why dont you read the first installment of my story.

Wow. I am awed at both the greatness of the story and at Snoinks critiquing prowess. Snoink your crazy. lol. Bravo to both of you.

Thanks guys. Twilight, you have the right of it; it was a sort of excorcism. I havent written the story in its entirety yet...actually to be truthful I wrote the ...

Shriek wrote:I thought most of the things in the beginning were superfluous. Nonsense, they helped to create the settting/scene in the mind of the reader. This is needed in every ...

Halleleujay!! (is that spelt right?) Thank you, very much. I appreciate it.

No please, dont inundate me with opinions. and I accidentally cut out "feedback appreciated" in the original post. Just incase you were wondering.

Ladydark wrote:....... remind me never to look at your work then, am simply trying to help, but obviously if I have over-done, then tell me not make fun of me ...

Geez, why dont you just re-write the whole damn thing! lol.

In case the last part was missed I will repeat it again: Feedback appreciated! Was it an appropriate prologue?, did it tell you enough about the nature of the story? ...

There are some definite good bits...but on the whole: its not so good. I get the feeling that the story is stretched a little thin. It needs to be more ...

Quote: A tall, slim, bearded robbed man sat alone at a corner table, deep in the back. Its robed, not robbed my silly little friend. Keep writing, you definetly have ...