Idraax

So this is what you were doing Lily! Do you have a theme for this! This should be our anthem for two years! I love the way, the first letters ...

Nooo! The smilies are gone! :( You will just have to picture a fish rolling around in the ocean laughing and trying to avoid bumping into the other fish. There's ...

Spread like a star, his hands are big I don't understand these two lines. How can hands be spread like a star? Thick and strong, a cord of muscle ripples ...

This was good. I think it's fine. Your narrator's voice was unique and your descriptions were enough. The only part which I'm confused about is did they move from the ...

I think you placed this in the wrong category. You left it on a cliffhanger, which makes me think you are going to continue this. If you are, then this ...

This seemed interesting, but very hard to read. Can you space out the dialogue, capitalize your I's, and put spaces between the punctuation marks? I did like your premise, but ...

So, this is my first atempt at Narrative Poetry... I'm not sure how it is but, I like it... I don't really like the ending, but that might jsut be ...

First, I've never really read scripts before, so it looks a little strange to me. Why is the entire thing in a spoiler? Why is the word raven capitalized? I ...

This wasn't bad, although it did leave me with a lot of questions; I'm assuming you'll explain the details in the next chapters. The one thing that bothered me was ...

[Please comment and review, thanks :) ] Foretold PART ONE Prolouge White, everything is white To me this is kind of repetitive. I think you can just start off with ...

This is interesting. I'm a little confused because you mention two pairs of lockets. I like the way the piece is flowing. The tension between the whole family is good. ...

This is good. I'm not really feeling the beginning, but that's because I have no idea what the Book of Revelations is about. I do wish you would have gone ...

Wow :D. This is great! I like the way you put this together, but I wish you would have slowed it down a little bit. Now I'm gonna read your ...

Why won't the words come? I know how I feel, and yet they are still stuck inside my head. I have felt this way very often I know what I ...

I love the sentence at the end. For some reason, I thought Gothella would have made them more nervous before she mentioned that she knew about the princes. How big ...