Evangelina

basically a woman calls this person beautiful, and even though she's a low-life, its the fact that someone, anyone, finally said it...

I'd remove any repeated words, it just isnt necessary. Overall, it was ok. A little vague, but with lots of hope and a good base.

Hehe, good job, Sur! I was iffy at first, but after I got into it, viola~ a masterpeice!

Thanks Kyl! Hey guys, Im submitting this for a literary journal. Wish me luck!

This is great, Fish! I love tidbits of history like this!

This was interesting. Good plot, descriptions lovely...not sure what, but somethings missing. I'll get back to yeh.

thanks Luna! I should attempt to write more, but brad scares me.

I thought we havent gone into Iran yet?

This whatever time :S A seperate reality. Idyll is pronounced I-dell. Thanks for the best crit! I'll work on more!

Thanks for checking it out! I've decided to dump it...

Love this poem! Its a great childs rhyme!

I adore this book. And the author.

"Sometimes the most simplest poems are the most beautiful, but never let your poem be common." ---Dead Poet's Society

CAL! I love the entire idea behind it, and the description is lovely. It's great! I want to see more :D

I agree on the over simplistic. It's just touching the surface. Find some emotion and delve deeper, eh? :D