Emerson

Hmmm It might take me a moment to gather my thoughts on this. So, first, to the grammar! Your punctuation structure was bothersome. Comma, comma, comma, period! Repeat. Doesn't really ...

*squee* Heather, you realize how upset I am? All this time, and I never knew how brilliant you were. I'm only iffy with some spots on punctuation, so let me ...

I began to [s]fill[/s] feel ill. 'It's okay , ' I told myself, 'It's nothing. It's just the heat.' “I'm not feeling too well,” I don't like the use of ...

It seeped into Damien’s neatly arranged linen and trickled over the table lip where Damien had been seated - he shifted slightly to avoid the spill. It pooled on cheap ...

Ack, Imp, you are simply beautiful with your words. This was very impressive, and it gave such a vivid image of a lady of the old world, in a new ...

Emi hit some grammar marks for me. I don't read lyrics a whole lot, but here will be the exception! You said "blue eyes" way more than one should, being ...

the plink of piano keys I love the p sound in this sentence. "Plink" is a beautiful word. Suddenly, an[s]d[/s] ochre lamp flickered on in the suite’s bedroom, Eric Mussen ...

The problem with the rhyme isn't a big deal (that lines skip) it's the fact that the rhythm is more or less non existent, and the rhyming is overly simplistic. ...

Her hands were dry and didn’t stick to my fur she would kiss my nose lightly when I wanted her to and in return, I’d rub my face on her ...

She had tripped over a rock [s]or something[/s] and fell onto the concrete. "or something" is just too vague. She tripped over a rock--end. ^_~ Aaron was starting to freak ...

If only the guys that wanted you weren't imaginary. I don't like the shift of tense in this sentence. The rest of the story is first person, but this is ...

For example, pandas the illness. being that PANDAS is an acronym, you should write it like: PANDAS. And, I know it causes OCD (I had a friend who got OCD ...

I like this! How is this bad? I did like this a whole lot, the fact that it had no punctuation or capitalization really worked for this. Although, I didn't ...

There isn't a whole lot to this...Apeva is right! Although, I would have hoped not to be as blunt as she was. There isn't anything about this that really stands ...

You have some typos in here that easily be fixed. Also the format can be changed--you don't need all the spaces between the lines. Oh, and punctuation is your friend! ...