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Re: a secret garden after the rain
Hi, Chanson! I love that ending. "You are a secret garden", oh, that's beautiful. Everything is messy, damp. Hmm. I'm not the greatest fan of this line. The words are ...
Sep 6, 2008 -
Re: Unobserved
Hi, clueless! I really like how the first and the last line bring it all together. The emotion in this piece is enjoyable, and I think you could expand the ...
Sep 6, 2008 -
Re: Iris
Hello, Tusker! There's really something about this. I like the main idea, and your imagery is sweet, as well. The second stanza is good, but I don't think the rhyming ...
Sep 6, 2008 -
Re: [deleted]
Hey, Sarah :) You do have a point there. It's sad how people often call the loudest, the prettiest, the thinnest, and the most wanted girls popular, even though some ...
Sep 6, 2008 -
Re: To Be Loved
Hello, Samantha. This is beautiful. Such a lot of emotion. I like the pondering, I like the length, because it shows you own this subject, and you have lots of ...
Sep 6, 2008 -
Re: ...Mum, I'm gay.
Wow, kris! It's really great. And I absolutely have to say that I adore the ending. It shows no one's perfect and really, the fear of telling the thing just ...
Sep 6, 2008 -
Re: Watching Windows - Chapter 10
Hi again! Oh no, it's the last chapter :( You need to write more soon, pretty please? I promise to keep writing mine if you keep writing yours :) I ...
Sep 6, 2008 -
Re: Watching Windows - Chapter 9
Hi, Sarah! I liked this chapter! And I like Douglas already, can't wait to find out more about him. I felt all the groggy misery I was too groggy These ...
Sep 6, 2008 -
Re: Nonsense poem!
Hi, bisquit! Personally, I love nonsense poems. This was entertaining as well, but I just want to say that it wasn't quite a poem, not with that kind of structure. ...
Sep 6, 2008 -
Re: The Quiet
Hi, gaylegoh! I liked this much. I feel all calm now, after reading your poem. It has a very soothing effect :) he knew then of our need. Hmm. I ...
Sep 6, 2008 -
Re: A love I always had
Hello, happybear! I liked this very much. It has the usual "raw" feeling that shows it's your first poem, but it didn't really matter. This was way better than my ...
Sep 5, 2008 -
Re: an young School boy's fear
Moi :) Okei, mä nyt kirjotan kuitenkin in english, että muutkin tajuaa ;) Okay, so I think you should rethink about the punctuation. As you can see, it's all just ...
Sep 5, 2008 -
Re: Watching Windows - Chapter 8
Hi! Help! I always feel so weird when there's a big jump in time :) Two years later and I still had not received any news or word of him ...
Sep 5, 2008 -
Re: Watching Windows - Chapter 7
Hi again ;) Hmm. One thing I didn't quite get was that all the people suddenly "hate" Amelia. Why? Is it because her mom doesn't remember who she is? If ...
Sep 5, 2008 -
Re: Watching Windows - Chapter 6
Hi, Sarah! Here I am again :) This was actually a rather good chapter, I didn't spot any major mistakes. Your description thing has gotten better, so that's better. By ...
Sep 5, 2008
