ChernobyllyInclined

"Good, good." "No, Bob, thats bad. Dash - got - sent - to - the - office." Well, I liked it. This is not the part that I had specific ...

I quite like the description. But I don't like the name 'Billy'. Just my prejudice against plain names... There are only a few technical problems. "Neither of us moved, the ...

Hmmm...This does not quite have enough to it to constitute a short story. Also, the title might discourage readers, try to think up something more grabbing. I looked down the ...

This was fantastic. And I don't just say that to anyone, something that you will notice if you ever come across one of my other critiques - or write something ...

That Nietszche quote...makes more sense when I read it. Never really got it too well when you read it, you know? I like how the advertisements at the bottom of ...

*dramatic music* The prologue to an epic that will sweep the nation! Unfortunately, causing great harm to its younger inhabitants. Yay. You put it on like I told you to. ...

You need to fix the format and put space between paragraphs. I would suggest throwing this out and beginning again. If you want to write a vampire story you MUST ...

Hmmm...This was okay. I found the concept interesting, it just wasn't introduced too well. Characters: Before anything else, I would like to bring up the one inconsistency that I found. ...

This was interesting. I quite liked the imagery and the description. I love the way you describe the paint like 'blood welling from a wound'. I like it when people ...

Hey, thanks for reviewing my story. Now I will reciprocate... This was surprisingly good. The characters were vivid and became interesting almost immediately. The descritption was also good, something

Thanks for reviewing my story. I am so thankful in fact that I will reciprocate and critique yours. Characters: I did not find the characters very compelling. Sam sounded too ...

Hmmm...Yes, I liked it. I liked it for somewhat conflicting reasons but I most definitely liked it. The only technical error that I found was the use of numbers. For ...

NEVER post this much at once. It is far from kind to people who would like to critique your work. But, aside from that, I would like to make some ...

Hmmm...I read the revised version and it was definitely better then the first draft. But their are still a few things I would like to suggest. The character that we ...

Hey! I'm not much of a lyrics person either, unfortunately, so I am useless for a critique, but this was quite original. The few other lyrics I have read have ...