Ben1243

Hey sarah, I thought this was really pretty good. It's very stream of consciousness because of the imagery which is great. One thing I'd change though is the stanza: "Memories ...

Ok........... no it is not the last too lines you need help with... its the whole thing. Listen, "saying" something about how "hurt" you are or whatever... writing the word ...

"leave you all alone"- cut to "leave you alone"... it sticks with your original rhythm... I haven't counted syllables but either way it feels better. And "love contained is threw" ...