Barrio

I am not sure if a married man would use the word 'gay'. "I she doesn't even talk like that when I'm around." This did not make sense. But yer, ...

I have to agree with uhhm, Amelia with the whole black soul thing, very cliche and also very unsuited for this piece. But overall i think it was well done, ...

She was griping her mothers hand tightly I think you meant to spell it as 'gripping'. The imagery is very well done, and it's a very nice, lucid piece of ...

I loved this actually, one of the more original stories posted. Was the character and the clow actually crying? i don't know if crying is too believable, but maybe tone ...

I think that maybe you should get at this like you woul when reading a play. So set out the scenes in which everything takes place to be a bit ...

I thought it was very good but the most obvious thing that strucks me, and the reason i opened it really was because your title misspelt 'Heaven'. I thought it ...

I was a bit confused by the choice of 'Mom' and then 'Mum' and seeing as you're a pom, i thought that it would be 'Mum.' But no, i actually ...

Yer i'm going to stick with the first guy and that it was bizarre. I couldn't really spot any grammatical errors or anything so it's written well, very well. You ...

You know, i think i liked the last line the most when it says " they would also be alive if little Leona hadn't gotten up to get a drink." ...

Hey sorry i think i should clear it up. I'm not sure how to go about using the quotes, so i'll just throw them in inverted commas. "I sit up ...

I'm a fan, i can't say i knew too well what was going on but it was written weirdly, good weirdly. I liked the vagueness to be quite honest, if ...

Hey, what i say may or may not sound stupid, but i feel i should critique somebody even if i dislike it. Did you ever think of trying to switch ...

Well, i don't mind the idea but i feel that too little goes on in their conversation. It just seems like two people who aren't friends meeting together to not ...