User avatar

Ardor

  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Here We Go *Edited*

    I think this is really nice. I also loved how you structure your poem. This gives a whole lot of meaning into your words. I especially love the language. It ...

    Aug 20, 2011
  • Other » General, General Re: F*** you

    Whoa. That was something. A lot of the 'f' bombs eh? Every paragraph had at least 2 uses of the word. I really liked it. It had a nice, tight ...

    Aug 19, 2011
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Twisted

    Well I really liked this. I liked that idea of twisting language, and you have pulled that off pretty darn well I must say. I also loved how you used ...

    Aug 11, 2011
  • Article / Essay » General, General Re: The greatest challenge facing my generation.

    I loved this essay. I really did; it had facts, opinions and chuck full of greatness. Excuse me for saying this, but you have a great mind. I am serious ...

    Aug 10, 2011
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Broken

    This is really good. This kind of reminds me of my poetry, which is a good thing. I loved how you kept it short and too the point. You said ...

    Aug 10, 2011
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Blind Love

    Now is my chance to review some of your work. Dear, Non-Rival. I think it's solid for a first post. Usually first posts are naive but this certainly doesn't hold ...

    Aug 9, 2011
  • Poetry » Narrative, General Re: The Man Without a Face (A Countdown of Hours)

    Well, that sure was intense! I agree with you: it is the best thing you have ever written. I have read all your other stuff, and I have to say ...

    Aug 9, 2011
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Codex (chap 2) Redone

    I really liked that tension in that chapter. I also felt you have developed the characters really well. At first I was going to say that the last line was ...

    Aug 9, 2011
  • Novel / Chapter » Romantic, General Re: Chapter One

    You seemed to have left a mistake at the end. You must've pushed the enter button when typing. The last paragraph either needs rearranging, a capital letter at the start ...

    Aug 9, 2011
  • Novel / Chapter » Action / Adventure, General Re: Mostly Human Chapter 1

    First off, I personally found the name of your chapter too long. Usually chapter names are meant to be short and snappy, whereas your one is a bit too long. ...

    Aug 9, 2011
  • Short Story » Fanfiction, General Re: Chapter One - When We Grow Up

    I really liked this piece. I love the way you paced that conversation between the two. Is this a romance? It feels very relaxed and breezy. This was made for ...

    Aug 8, 2011
  • Poetry » Narrative, General Re: Candlelight Flicker

    Haha! That was really funny! For a joke poem it was really good. I really liked your use of the repeated word with something that rhymes afterwards. I really enjoyed ...

    Aug 8, 2011
  • Poetry » Narrative, General Re: Bruised Arms, Scarred Heart

    I really liked how this piece flowed; the idea of how this innocent girl gets with this guy is really fluent and very well expressed. There are a few nitpicks. ...

    Aug 8, 2011
  • Article / Essay » General, General Re: Re: Leadership

    Pardon my language WTMeighan, but this guy is a f'ing idiot. I am sorry for using that language, but I am serious. First off, he disses Nate, the owner of ...

    Aug 6, 2011
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: The Power of the Crystal

    Wow. That was pretty good for a story. I don't think this technically counts as a novel. It has to be in chapters in order to be a novel, but ...

    Aug 6, 2011


'Tis the season to shovel enormous amounts of watermelon into your mouth while hunched over the cutting board like a dehydrated vampire that hasn't fed on blood in four hundred years and the only viable substitute is this questionable Christmas-colored fruit.
— Ari11