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Aravis10

Aravis10

  • Novel / Chapter » Historical Fiction, Narrative Re: Asenath:Tears on the Sand Chapter 8

    I totally agree with the part about the beginning of the chapter. I broke up one chapter into two, so it has an awkward beginning. Slave language isn't a real ...

    Apr 27, 2014
  • Novel / Chapter » Historical Fiction, Narrative Re: Asenath:Tears on the Sand Chapter 9

    It's fine! Thank you!

    Apr 27, 2014
  • Novel / Chapter » Historical Fiction, Narrative Re: Asenath:Tears on the Sand Chapter 9

    Woah! I went back and read through really carefully trying to see what you were saying. I use "was" and "felt" a lot! I didn't even notice it before!

    Apr 26, 2014
  • Novel / Chapter » Historical Fiction, Narrative Re: Asenath:Tears on the Sand Chapter 8

    I agree about the short sentences. When i was reading through it again today, I noticed that. The relationship between Asenath and Oni is difficult. I've never had a servant ...

    Apr 26, 2014
  • Novel / Chapter » Historical Fiction, Narrative Re: Asenath:Tears on the Sand Chapter 8

    I'm back! My life has finally slowed down for a few days. :) Sorry I've been gone for so long.

    Apr 26, 2014
  • Novel / Chapter » Historical Fiction, Narrative Re: Asenath:Tears on the Sand Chapter 7

    I know that this chapter is a little short, but I thought that if I put in the next section, it would be too long.

    Jan 2, 2014
  • Novel / Chapter » Historical Fiction, Narrative Re: Asenath:Tears on the Sand Chapter 6

    At the beginning it says that it is her 17th birthday. But, from all her experiences, she has matured past her age. Thanks for reviewing!

    Nov 25, 2013
  • Novel / Chapter » Historical Fiction, Narrative Re: Asenath:Tears on the Sand Chapter 3

    I know the other chapters were better but I felt that I needed this chapter for later on. Thanks for reviewing! And on't worry. Yoku didn't sound harsh at all.

    Nov 10, 2013
  • Novel / Chapter » Historical Fiction, Narrative Re: Asenath:Tears on the Sand Chapter 3

    Thank you! Yes, I am trying to set things up. I didn't want to go over board on this because it isn't a totally major but I'm not sure if ...

    Nov 10, 2013
  • Short Story » Fantasy, Romantic Re: Legend of King Arin: Rise of Darkness

    I totally understand!

    Nov 6, 2013
  • Novel / Chapter » Historical Fiction, Narrative Re: Asenath:Tears on the Sand Chapter 2

    And fix some of it in this one!

    Nov 4, 2013
  • Novel / Chapter » Science Fiction, Technology Re: The Quantum Mind: Chapter 4

    Thank you!

    Nov 4, 2013
  • Novel / Chapter » Historical Fiction, Narrative Re: Asenath:Tears on the Sand Chapter 2

    Thanks! I will try to do those things in the next chapters!

    Nov 4, 2013
  • Novel / Chapter » Historical Fiction, Narrative Re: Asenath:Tears on the Sand Chapter 2

    Thanks! Sometimes I miss those little things.

    Nov 4, 2013
  • Novel / Chapter » Historical Fiction, Narrative Re: Asenath:Tears on the Sand Chapter 2

    Shhhhh! Don't give the plot away! ;) i'm kidding. she is a historical character so it is easy to find information on her. Thank for your comments!

    Nov 4, 2013


When a good man is hurt, all who would be called good must suffer with him.
— Euripides