Young Writers Society

all's well that ends well
a revered line from Shakespeare
it's very, very true.
sometimes you get sad
that your favorite event is over,
but keep the memories of it near;
it will all turn out alright.
enjoy life for the next eleven months,
for all is going to be well.
When that time has past,
you can get right to doing it again.

Ellie look who's gotten into writing poetry all of a sudden !

Well the title drew me in, I'm a huge Shakespeare girl. I've acted in a bunch of plays, and read almost all of his plays, so a poem about All's Well That Ends Well makes me smile. See the biggest thing that stuck out at me was the way things were capitalized. You've got no capitalization at all, until you say Shakespeare, which makes it look out of place, then not again until the very end stanza/line thing. Which really surprises me because you're usually so picky about properly capitalizing things when reviewing. Anyway the poem itself was not all that great, You've got great concepts for poems, but the results are just a little bit of a letdown. I'm sad to say there's not much poetry in your poems. They seem to be just you telling us things in a poetic format. Try reading some more free verse, and look up how to write it. There's actually an art to it, and that's what I'm learning about in English class write now.

Good luck to you, and keep writing!

Heya Elinor!
You've reviewed quite a lot of my stuff, so I thought I'd finally pay you back!

all's well that ends well
a revered line from Shakespeare
it's very, very true.

I like the first line of this but I'm not too sure about the next two. Like a novel or a troy, it's always important that the first few lines of a poem draws the reader in. I wasn't necessarily drawn in by these!

enjoy life for the next eleven months,
for all is going to be well.

I liked these two lines, I like the message they give.

When that time has past,
you can get right to doing it again.

Like the beginning of a poem, the ending is also important. Also like the beginning of your poem, the ending was rather weak; sorry! You need it to be something that makes the reader go 'Wow! That was unexpected!' or 'Wow! That was so beautiful!'. Do you get what I mean?

Overall

Like BondGirl said, the title of this poem is what drew me in. I'm also a huge Shakespeare fan and I love his work! I have to admit though, the poem itself was a bit of a let down. Sorry! It just seemed more like a few lines put together in a certain order. You didn't have any imagery and you didn't really make me feel anything. I'm not saying that you should make the poem fifty lines long and full of simile's, metaphor's e.t.c. That would just be annoying... You just need to include some kind of imagery!

My other critique is the fact that you haven't really capitalized anything. This might not bother others, but it kind of bothers me. It's mostly important to capitalize simply to make the poem look better! For example ~

All's well that ends well
a revered line from Shakespeare
it's very, very true.
Sometimes you get sad
that your favorite event is over,
but keep the memories of it near;
it will all turn out alright.
Enjoy life for the next eleven months,
for all is going to be well.
When that time has past,
you can get right to doing it again.

Even though only a few words have been capitalized, the poem itself looks a lot better! Do you see what I mean?

Although the capitalizing isn't perfect, the grammar is! Bad grammar is something that really bugs me and thankfully, there is no sign of bad grammar here. An awful lot of people tend to get confused when it comes to grammar in a poem, but you clearly aren't among them. Most people seem to think that there has to be a comma or a period at the end of a line in poetry! Considering you aren't as used to writing poems as you are to writing stories, the grammar is very good. Well done!

Even though your poem isn't the most amazing poem I've ever read, I still actually quite liked it. I liked the message of the poem and I actually liked the shortness of it. I'm one of those cool people who prefer short poems to long ones. I think that it's very effective when a poet can say so much in such few lines.

Like I just said, your poem wasn't outstandingly incredible, but it definitely wasn't the worst I've read. All that you need to do is think about what us reviewers have suggested and hopefully, you can edit your poem a bit to make it super good! I know that you're more than capable, you're a very, very good writer. Do what BondGirl suggested; read some more free verse and take note of what the poet does to make the poem great.

Once again, thanks for reviewing some of my stuff and I'm sorry if I haven't been much help!

Keep writing and good luck with this; I know that you can make it great.

xoxo Skins

all's well that ends well
very good but u should add italics to all"s and ends

a revered line from Shakespeare
i think shakespeare should also be italics

it's very, very true.
sometimes you get sad
these two line are good

that your favorite event is over,
italic favorite

but keep the memories of it near;
it will all turn out alright.
enjoy life for the next eleven months,
for all is going to be well.
When that time has past,
you can get right to doing it again.

the rest is very good and i think if you make those small changes

All's well that ends well
a revered line from Shakespeare
it's very, very true.

This is my favorite part, but I feel like the line "All's well that ends well" should be in quotations to show that you are reciting it. I also like the idea of All's and ends being in italics from a previous post, it emphasizes the most important words.

Sometimes you get sad
that your favorite event is over,
but keep the memories of it near;
it will all turn out alright.

What kind of event? Like a holiday or wedding? I don't know if event is the best word for this line. You say that "it will all turn out alright" as if something is wrong. Is something wrong or are you just sad because the event is over?

Enjoy life for the next eleven months,
for all is going to be well.

Why eleven months? It brings me back to the "event", what kind is it? I like the last line a lot too.

When that time has past,
you can get right to doing it again.

I don't understand the last line. You can get right? What does that mean?

Over all I love the message, its hopeful. Which we need to hear more of, as people. Keep writing!

Thanks, but this is old and I'm not looking for any further advice.

Locked.