Published December 11, 2005
"Bitch"
Why do you torment me so?
Flaunting your good looks
reminding us how pitiful we are
you prance everywhere you go
the bouncing magnifying how silky your locks are
boys eagerly follow you
wanting a piece
but none is for sale
you dominate them
one by one
before moving on to another
you are not interested romantically even
in the handsome ones
other girls, pretty and homely alike
despise you
get a clue will you?
you are clueless
you expect us all to love you
and we do.
It's about my spade dog Boo, shes a huge poodle. Comment!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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139,534 Literary Works • 672,600 Reviews
It sounds more about popular mean girls like the book The Clique. I like this poem ,really. I can really figure out the dog parts of the poem, though. I love it.
i understand this poem, and yes it is great, i see how you love your dog enought to write apoem about her, i cant really write poems, the spelling looked correct, i looked through that, over all good job
Great idea Snionk! I once read a book called My Life as a Bitch. Good book. READ IT!!!
No! Writing about female dogs in a super confusing way is great! I've done it before with a poem called Penelope... it makes me sound like a lesbian. XD But still!
I like this. I probably would spurce up the title though to something weirder... a title with the word "bitch" in it would be awesome. Cool play on words, etc.
One thing:
There's too many "you" words in there. Try to either add more words or limit the "you" words.
Should I make it about a girl instead of a dog?
Cliche....! ^_^ It was good, but I've just read so many like it.....
The title's really catchy, isn't it, but I guess it's unfair. Dogs are usually like that, aren't they, jumping from one mate to another
Blame Snionk's list of how to anoy critiques!
If you are going to post a poem, use the name of the poem in the title, not "READn This!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's GREAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
That just gets me annoyed.
Overall, a good, well written poem. I couldn't find any grammarical errors...but, then again, I'm the one who has a C in English.
I personally think that this poem applies to a beutifull girl as much, if not more, than a dog;cut the poodle part and this will be grade-A.