i think this is very poor. just very, very bad. it's not even a poem. it doesn't flow at all. imagine that i am in a car. and i am going down a road. imagine this road has speed bumps every twenty feet. and imagine that it's a very shoddy road. that's kind of what this poem is like. sorry if you've experienced a break-up or something, but this really isn't a good poem. it doesn't really tell a good story, or have structure, or actually have any elements of poetry in it. i could basically sum it up in one sentence. i won't, because that would be cruel.
please, next time you post here, write a poem. this isn't a place to scream out your sad emotions, contrary to popular belief. if you're going to be expressing those, at least do it artfully. that's all i really wanted to say about this one. i imagine that you have some potential in you for poetry, as most everyone does. utilize it.
-Zalarus
Points: 890
Reviews: 34
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