Young Writers Society

Fruit4you here to review! I absolutely love this. It is a jovial poem. I cannot express my love for this. But I think you meant "With a small bucket and" and not "With small bucket and". You also had wonderful flow throughout your poem. This kind of reminds me of Pixie Hollow and Tinkerbell!

Keep writing, Fruit4you

Hi...Hello...Hey...and Happy Day...

Ooooo!! Your short little poem is sooooooooo cute. I can imagine the whole thing. A yellow pixie or green like Tinkerbell, so bright, so glittering, so magical before my eyes. Into the restless green. With a bucket of fairy-dusts, brushing the trees...Awesome...

I liked it so much only because of your imagination. So much I like fantasy and supernatural beauty like fairies or vampires or wolves, I'm a big fan of fairy-tales also.
'TakeThatYouFiend' is right. It is refreshing to read a poem that is not about love or depression.
But it surely is a matter of sorrow that nothing on earth is totally perfect. So your cute poem has a defect also. I can see this one has a bit rythm problem. I mean it is a little off-rythmed. You should keep an eye on your rythm. good rythm can cover more than 50% of a good poem, I think. But your subject is too good to cover more than 70% of it. So, I'll rate your poem 60%. For me the YWS highest rating is 65%. I give 100% to only the poems of Robert Frost, Shakespeare and Dante.

I love these lines the most:]

I’ve seen a little fairy
In between the trees
With small bucket and
Tiny brush she dusts
The trees

And:]

we are wrong
It is the work of fairies

Good Writing :0 *_*

Best wishes...have a nice day...and Happy Late New Year.
^_^

By the way your prof. pic is cool.

Urba.
The ordinary girl...
(The ratings are totally the reflections my own opinion)

Greetings on this fine review day! (Go Blue!)
This is a nice poem, and you have two major strengths.
Firstly, your rhythm. This poem read extremely easily, and the rhythm meant everything made perfect sense, despite the subject having potential to confuse.
Secondly, it is just nice to read a poem that isn't about love or depression. Depression poems get a little, well, depressing.
Suggestions for improvement:
Third/Fourth line. I suggest you don't use the word "And" at the end of a line. Rather put it at the beginning of the fourth line.
Hope this helps,
Take That You Fiend!

Awww! This is really good. I can picture all the little fairies working hard for winter.

"We all have thought
That when winter comes
It is the frost and snow
That lightly covers the trees
And turns them almost white
But no, we are wrong
It is the work of fairie"

It reminds me of that Tinkerbell movie!! I don't really have any corrections
Just keep on Writing!!!

'With A small bucket and A tiny brush" is what it should be.
The line breaks don't feel quite right.
It's all the things I said the last poem is. You're an awesome poet.
-tgirly

Hallo Yubbies. Noni here to give you a short but hopefully helpful review today.

This is a nice, cutesy poem and has potential to be a good poem. The beginnings of a rhyme scheme and a foundation of rhythm show that you've got a bit of an idea about poetry, but ti's obvious that you haven't written that much poetry.

The rhyme and rhythm are a good starting point, so here's a bit of a tip. In poetry (although not always) emphasis is usually naturally placed on the last word in each line. That means that you want to put more important words like verbs and nouns at the end of the lines. Things like prepositions such as "with" in line five take the focus off of the main ideas in the poem and break up the flow, making reading a bit awkward.

Flow in a poem can be used to drastically change the effect and feel of a poem and while a smooth flow is not always desired for the intended effect, it is generally the best choice when writing a poem. While you do have the beginnings of a decently smooth flow in this poem, it is rather bumpy at places. While also implementing the tip from the previous paragraph, using line breaks like punctuation can help improve a poems flow. When reading a poem, the natural response is to make a pause at the end of each line so try to break up your lines where you'd naturally put a pause in your words.

You've began to flesh out your ideas fairly well in the poem. And you've began to paint a pretty clear picture. While I myself would personally add more detail to the images in the lines, the amount that you have put in is fairly reasonable and nothing to complain about. Though I do like the simple conclusion of the lat stanza, I can't help but feel it needs one more line (maybe a metaphor?) describing the actions of the fairies in one summarized line to neatly conclude the poem.

All in all. It is a good attempt at a poem and by standards is better than what most would achieve at your age poetry-wise. Anyways, I hope this helps and as always, keep writing!

-noninjaspresent >(>==)>*

Finally got published! The book it's in just arrived today! So excited! =) =D

The rhythm of the poem is a little off, but the structure is still great. Nice job!