Legends: Gladiator, Part 1, Chapter 5

by yoshikrab

Published November 7, 2020

E - Everyone Violence

In Legends: Gladiator

Blistering. Burning. Blazing. The desert was not like Scarlet imagined.

In her head, she imagined that the desert would be more like a beach. This was nothing like a beach. This was more like the surface of the sun.

“You sure we’re not flying towards the sun?” asked Mockingbird, her thoughts floating along the same lines as Scarlet’s.

Scarlet grunted and glanced back, “We’ll find Condor no matter what. Even if we have to go to the blasted Ice Kingdom.” Mockingbird shivered at the thought of the Ice Kingdom and seemed to toughen up at the blistering heat ahead.

The rope pointed towards a place that seemed to be some town or city of sorts.

“Maybe she’s there?” asked Jasper, pointing towards the populated area ahead.

“That would be bad news and worse news,” said Finch darkly.

“Why? What good news and bad news?” asked Mockingbird.

“That up ahead,” said Finch, “Would be the Scorpion Den. It's not that nice. Everything there is stinky and dirty. Typical SandWing life. If Condor’s there, she would probably end up lookin' like a MudWing.”

“What about the worse news?” asked Mockingbird. She shivered again, probably hoping that she was in the Ice Kingdom.

Scarlet eyed a cactus in the distance. It looked very . . . un-cactus-like.

It seemed . . . fake . . . for some reason. Suspicious, Scarlet flapped over to the “cactus”, and found that it was actually a very well-drawn image of a cactus.

“Okay, who’s there?” asked Scarlet.

No answer.

“Who’s there?”

No answer.

Scarlet tentatively grabbed the piece of scroll-like object and burned it.

Behind it seemed to be a little huddled group of scavengers. One of the scavengers was holding a silver stabby-looking thing that closely resembled a very short spear. The other was holding an actual spear. A third Scavenger was a female one. Scarlet was delighted. She had never seen wild Scavengers before. 

Deciding that she would observe them before eating them, Scarlet roared. The three scavengers turned and ran. 

Scarlet was very curious what the scavengers were doing in the desert and why they were trying to look like a cactus, but she also felt they had some expression on their faces. Their faces were weirdly dragon-like.

She wanted to chase them but flew back over to the rest of her group.

“. . . Just tell me!” cried Mockingbird.

“Why?” said Finch mischeviously.

Mockingbird began growling in a very low tone that Scarlet had never heard before, so she got in between and said, “Okay, let’s go to the Scorpion Den!”

Finch looked satisfied. Mockingbird looked disgruntled. Jasper looked relieved and terrified.

Rolling her eyes, Scarlet turned around and shouted, “Last one there is a lazy RainWing!” Beating her wings as fast as she could, Scarlet zoomed ahead. She looked back and saw that Jasper was lagging behind (As usual) and Finch was ahead.

When the group reached the Scorpion Den, they saw two SandWings fighting in an alley. Scarlet glanced around, trying to find a hint of Condor or just anything red. After a few blocks, there was a horde of SandWing children charging past, chasing a cat. They turned an alley and found that it was a dead end.

When they turned back around to exit, there were three bulky SandWings with ugly faces blocking their way.

“Can you three move?” asked Scarlet regally.

“We’d rather not,” replied the one in the front.

“Yeah!” replied the SandWing on the left, trying and failing to look threatening.

“We saw you comin’ in and searchin’ for somethin’. Hope you weren’t searching for anything that belongs to us SandWings. That would be uncivil,” said the front SandWing, stomping forward.

“We are here on royal premises,” replied Scarlet, mustering all of the defiance she could get.

Finch looked as terrified as Scarlet had ever seen him. He squeaked, "The worse news i-i-is that the SandWings here are m-m-mostly mercenaries and assassins."

The first SandWing lazily clapped his talons together and nine SandWings suddenly leaped from a roof and grabbed Scarlet, Finch, and Mockingbird. Jasper dodged and cowered in a corner. Scarlet fought them off angrily. Slash. Stab. Scorch. Stab. Scorch. Stab. Slice. Slash. Slash. She killed one and almost ended up dead herself trying to kill the second. To her horror, a SandWing stabbed her tail into Finch’s chest, sending blood spewing everywhere.

Scarlet apprehended that dragon by grabbing the SandWing’s tail and stabbing her attacker with it. Mockingbird managed to fly away, and the SandWings didn’t bother to chase her.

Three down, six to go, thought Scarlet hopelessly, Wait no. Nine to go.

Fighting off the SandWings the best she could, Scarlet realized something new. It was as if new light dawned in her eyes. 

She needed to preserve her life so that she could save Condor’s. Steeling up, she mustered the dignity and courage to say what she was about to say next. She had never, ever, said the next words before in her life.

Glaring at no dragon in particular, Scarlet growled, “We surrender.”

“That’s the spirit,” one of the SandWings replied heartily. Two SandWings grabbed Jasper and carried him away.

Laughing, the first SandWing grinned wildly and began to slither towards Scarlet, “Princess Scarlet of the SkyWings. The Queen Scarab would be delighted to meet you.”

Comments & reviews · 3
User avatar
Horisun
Review
Horisun wrote a review Review · Nov 10, 2020

Hello there! It's me! The person spamming your notifications with reviews!

Right off the bat, the first line was a missed joke. You wrote "Blistering, scorching, blazing," And you could've wrote, "Blistering, blazing, burning," and I would've been laughing (I have a strange sense of humor)

I just wanna say that Jasper and Mockingjay are great! I love, love, love them. And also terrified for Jasper, because I love him already, lol.

Now, I actually have to argue something here, about the Scorpion Den. In the books, it has always been a place where dragons don't really mind what tribe they're from. I get that that's mostly caused by the war, and Thorn, but I feel like their would be a reason why dragons flocked to it in the first place, and not anywhere else.
One last critique, the battle happened way to fast. I had to stop, and reread the paragraph where it begun, because it happened so fast.
A way to make it so the reader can really FEEL like they are part of the fight is to describe the emotion rather than what the character is specifically doing. I feel like even though Scarlet is slightly crazy when it comes to killing, she'd still have a bit more of a reaction when her friend is stabbed.

Other than that, great chapter! Loved the character interactions! This review turned out a bit negative, and I'm really sorry about that. I honestly really liked this chapter, and the Scorpion Den is one of my favorite settings in Wings of Fire, so I'm so excited to see what you do with it!
I shall soon return for chapter six!

Thank you for the review!

Hey, don't worry if your review is bad; I WANT bad reviews. It shows what I did wrong and what I can do to change it. (Although, some nice words Is preferred ;p)

I'm glad you like Jasper!

User avatar
EM8650
Review
EM8650 wrote a review Review · Nov 9, 2020

Hi there,
You have written another amazing chapter, however there are some things i think you could work on.
The first thing i noticed was the chapter continuation, you have started this chapter by jumping straight into a new setting an while that is okay, for this chapter i think you could of mention something about the encounter with Morrowseer.
There are a couple more grammar mistakes in this chapter than the last but if you read over the chapter you will find them.
i liked the way you described Scarlet's actions during this chapter, specifically when she discovers the scavengers.
I also loved how we get to see all the character develop even more through this chapter.
Overall yet another really good piece of work. i love how the story is developing.
I look forward to new chapters.
Keep up the fantastic work.



You cannot understand and disagree.
— P. D. Ouspensky