Woo-hoo! Chapter three done! It was on a REALLY tight schedule too! I'm very proud of my work ethic, if I do say so myself. Anyways, enjoy! :D
“What?” exclaimed Scarlet, “Animus objects? We have an animus? What was an animus again?”
“Had an animus. The last animus we had was a secret one about two-hundred years ago. But that’s not important. An animus is a dragon that can make anything happen by just saying it.” said Citrine.
“Wow,” Scarlet was awestruck. That kind of power would be fundamental in almost any situation, “That’s so cool! So basically, all of these things in here are objects that do stuff? Enchanted by animi?”
“Yes,” said Citrine, “I can tell you all about them, but that would take too long. I’m going to have to tell you the story.”“The STORY? Come ON! I want to know what these all do!” cried Scarlet impatiently.
“Listen up or you won’t get to know,” Citrine looked at her sternly.
The Queen and Scarlet glared at each other for a long while, and then Citrine began, “Long ago, there was an animus. He was the first recorded animus, and his name was Pyro. This was about nine-hundred years ago, and he had heard about the tragedy of Prince Albatross, a SeaWing animus who went crazy. Pyro then vowed to never use his magic unless it was for the good of the tribe. In his life, he made five objects: The Rain Pebble, which can control rain; The Shield Skull, which can make anyone holding it invulnerable; The Searching Rope, which can find any dragon if you say their name; The Listener Shell, which could work as a long-distance communication; and finally, the Frostbreath Crown, which could allow any SkyWing who wears it to be able to breathe frostbreath like an IceWing.”
After hearing Citrine say this, Scarlet looked around, awestruck. Suddenly, all the objects in the room looked more majestic than before.
“Pyro then passed down his powers to his three dragonets after he died: Garnet, Ammolite, and Pezzottaite. At that time, Garnet worked for the Queen Buzzard, Ammolite worked solo and sometimes granted wishes, but Pezzottaite plotted with NightWings, and won part of the Sky Kingdom with them. Garnet retaliated against Pezzottaite, and both princesses were killed, leaving Ammolite as the only animus. None of the three sisters made any objects for the good of the Sky Kingdom except for Garnet, who made possibly the most powerful animus-touched object of all,” said Citrine.
“What was it?” asked Scarlet tentatively.
“The Power Orb,” replied her mother, “Anyone who touches the Power Orb will be able to best their next opponent no matter what. It’s a bit more complicated than that, but that’s a summary of it. The downside is that if someone does any wrongdoing during that period between touching the Orb and beating their opponent, they will burst into flames.”
“Please tell me how it works!” cried Scarlet. It would be a VERY useful object to use before any battle, really, thought Scarlet's traitorous mind.
“Not now,” said Citrine, “Only my trusted advisors know.”
Scarlet refrained from growling, because she was just too curious, “Okay then, what happened next?”
“Animus magic was in the royal bloodline for a generation, but quickly left. After many generations, all of those objects and the animus power ended up in the talons of a bloodthirsty warrior named Sparrowhawk. Sparrowhawk abused his powers to take back the SkyWings rightful land from the NightWings, sending the NightWing tribe fleeing to another place to live. Eventually, Sparrowhawk was assassinated by an agent of the ruler that that time, Queen Mockingbird. This was about two hundred years ago,” said Citrine.
“That last SkyWing animus,” breathed Scarlet.
“Yes,” said Citrine, “First, remember to NOT talk about any of this. These are secrets meant for the royal family only. Now, back to the point. I believe I can gift you one of the objects for a time so that you can use them.”
“Sure!” said Scarlet, excited, “Which one?”
It could be the Shield Skull? Maybe so I can fly anywhere without getting hurt? Or maybe it’s the Frostbreath Crown? Wait. Why would I need the Frostbreath Crown? Maybe . . . Maybe it’s THE POWER ORB! YES! So I can CRUSH my enemies beneath my TALONS! No. Citrine would never give me that. That means . . . maybe it could be . . .
“The Searching Rope,” said Citrine, “So you can find her.”
“Awesome! So, uh, how does it work?” asked Scarlet.
“Say the name of the dragon you want to find and picture them in your mind while holding the rope. Then it will point in the direction of that dragon and only point differently if it touches the dragon you want or you instruct it to point somewhere else,” replied the Queen.
Slowly, Scarlet creeped up to the pedestal with the rope and reached a tentative talon towards it.
“It’s not booby-trapped,” said Citrine, amused, “Although I should probably booby-trap them from now on. Good idea!”
Scarlet grabbed the rope and said, “Condor.”
Just saying her beautiful name sent a wave of emotions throughout Scarlet: the two of them meeting an IceWing for the first time when they were dragonets; Condor teaching Scarlet how to dance (Against her will); flying across the eastern beaches and getting attacked by SeaWings. Scarlet shook her head, sending away any tears that could have formed.
The rope pointed towards the right of Citrine, so Scarlet guessed it was going in that direction.
“It’s working?” asked Scarlet.
“It’s working,” confirmed Citrine.
Scarlet grinned, “Then let’s get out of here!”
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Anddddd I'm back from the last review, so no need for intros!
This is an oddly pure moment between Scarlet and her mom. It was a pleasant suprise, even if I didn't really expect it.
Just like the last chapter, the dialogue was done really well! All the characters have their own voices, and the way the characters interact is just great!
I don't really have any particular critiques with this one, but I'd like to point out a few plot holes I noticed right off the bat (And maybe you'll patch this by the end, I don't know)
First of all, the Rope here could have been used to find the dragonets easily. Even if she couldn't get to them, Ruby would've found them once she became Queen, and could've used it to find her Mother.
Second of all, the Skywings killed there animus's. You could argue he is a secret one, but the fact that they have clearly been doing it for generations before him, I don't understand how he came to exist at all.
And finally, the Nightwings had been in hiding for YEARS by the time this Skywing supposedly betrayed his tribe. The Nightwings wouldn't be looking for new land to live on, because they'd all be hiding on the volcano by this point, AND they are still scared of Darkstalker.
Other than those plot holes I noticed, this chapter was a really good bridge to the next one! Keep on writing, and have a good day!
(Also, one last thing, it'd be really helpful if you put all of the chapters into one file, so I didn't have to go looking for the next one)
Ah, here's the thing . . . the rope here doesn't last the entire story, just so you're wondering.
Again, the NightWings live on an island north of Pyrrhia. They could possibly have inhabited some other parts of Pyrrhia for a short time, but yeah, i have to admit it is unlikely.
Anyways, thanks for the review!
And you can find the chapters in my portfolio and (some) on my profile.
-y0sH!
Hey there again,
I love the way you have drawn out the plot, it just leave me as a reader hanging on ever word.
There isn't anything i can find that needs fixing but i would suggest that you watch your pacing. In some places your writing feel a little rushed. You can fix this by taking some time to write some little descriptions.
Over all i am loving this novel/ chapter series, i think you have done a really really good job, with both the wording and the creative sides. I can't wait for new chapters!
Keep up the magnificent work!
Thank you so much!!!!