My Infernal Sight

by xhalcyonx128

Published November 2, 2007

this is a political statement that i wrote up in math class today. its rough and needs work, so any critique is welcome.


I can see nothing here
Except an ivory dome.

Inside, a curious child
Lights up dynamite’s fuse.

The watching neighbors laugh
As the building implodes.

It would be better
For me to be blind.

Comments & reviews · 4
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Kim
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Kim commented Comment · Nov 2, 2007

i reallly like it, i cant write poetry so i cant critique for you. but i can tell you if i like it lol. you are very good.

kim

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Rjjr_vectra
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Rjjr_vectra commented Comment · Nov 2, 2007

Surrealist? It didn't make sense, wouldn't the building explode if the kid lit up dynamite? Eh well, it was good but ambiguous. Elaborate! Write more, please!

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Gwenevire
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Gwenevire commented Comment · Nov 2, 2007

I really like it!
But its hard to understand is it about war?



Once you have people's attention, you have a greater responsibility to tell them something of value.
— Tobias Forge (Ghost B.C.)