Published November 2, 2007
this is a political statement that i wrote up in math class today. its rough and needs work, so any critique is welcome.
I can see nothing here
Except an ivory dome.
Inside, a curious child
Lights up dynamite’s fuse.
The watching neighbors laugh
As the building implodes.
It would be better
For me to be blind.
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i reallly like it, i cant write poetry so i cant critique for you. but i can tell you if i like it lol. you are very good.
kim
Surrealist? It didn't make sense, wouldn't the building explode if the kid lit up dynamite? Eh well, it was good but ambiguous. Elaborate! Write more, please!
I really like it!
But its hard to understand is it about war?