Young Writers Society

I rather enjoyed this
I wish i could write stuff like this, all my work is boring compared to this haha

I am in a rush, therefore I do not have much time to write a big review, but I thought there was something in need of saying. You used very overused words in poetry, like darkness, recoiled, blood, light. Try staying away from those words, and your poetry will be fresh and original.

You should also try branching out from that dark to light type of poetry. It is very cliche. Try writing about that grey area, if you know what i mean

Hiya winie! Let's get down to business...

~Ideas~

Interesting idea with the pendant, because it gives way to more of a story that's waiting to be told. It was very imaginative, very compelling. I'd like more of your imagination though, because I feel you have more to offer.

~Flow and Imagery~

I got a decent picture from your description, but the problem is that it just doesn't fit together. For example:

I curled my blood-stained fingers around the pendant,
trying to cover the dim light from spreading into the darkness.

I had once again awoke within this world, the pendant had won.
And so I had prevailed.

The darkness candle had burn and only ashes would remain.
I had once again awoke within this world, the pendant had won.

I curled my blood-stained fingers around the pendant,
trying to cover the dim light from spreading into the darkness.

I had once again awoke within this world, the pendant had won.

Ohhh, I liked this! I really did. I wish I could write this way

I recoiled.

I had once again awoke within this world, the pendant had won.
And so I had won.