life is fragile, precious, gone
a candle snuffer sitting o’er the sun at dawn
clamp a cup over the newly budding lilies of the spring
and watch them shrivel beneath its darkened weight
fragile souls, fragile bones, fragile beaks, fragile homes
shattered at the whims of the water and the cold
foolish mistakes and taken lights
how i wish they had the chance to grow old
Hello! Forever here for a short review!!!
It was a wonderful and a great read! I don't have words to express my feelings. I really like reading short poems. Life is sorrowful... I have a question– why didn't u use caps? Was it intentional? If yes, then also I think u should capitalize the i in the last line. And you should use punctuation marks.
Overall, a very good poem! Keep writing!
~Forever
Hi, Pineapple here for a little review!
Wow, this poem was a great read. It was short and sweet yet made the reader ponder. It sort of told a story as well. Your word choice was excellent and the way you described things was great, too.
My favorite lines were "life is fragile, precious, gone" and "foolish mistakes and taken lights". I liked the first one because life is definitely something that could be taken for granted. I liked the first line because everyone makes mistakes but whether they fix their mistakes or not is up to them.
Your title was also cool, too. I didn't really know what I was expecting so it made the read exciting.
Overall, great job on this. I hope you keep writing!
Signed,
Pineapple
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