Published April 20, 2009
This is NOT the best poem I've ever written, just thought I'd tell you. Hope you enjoy it though
Why hello there
I'm death, nice to meet you
Oh your colourful hair
I like colours
Colourful skin
Colourful eyes
Eyes the colour of fish fin
Skin the colour of milk
Don't be scared now
I'm not wearing the cloak
Why are you here? How?
I hoped you would be different
Not ask the same as the others
The fathers, the brother, the husbands
The mothers, the sisters, the wives
Just the same unfortunatly
Your smart enough to know
Know why I'm here
Everybody dies, high or low
They all die
I'm here to make it-
Better, easier, nicer
It's a hard hit
But without death there cannot be life
Come now, foolow me
You with your colourful hair
Onto the after time with me
You with your skin of milk
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Well, to start it was kind of confusing for me. This part here:
Why hello there
"I'm death, nice to meet you
Oh your colourful hair
I like colours
Colourful skin
Colourful eyes
Eyes the colour of fish fin
Skin the colour of milk"
To me doesn't really fit in. I don't see how it has to do with it.. But thats just me. I liked the idea of it!
I'm thinking maybe you should have put "Eyes the colour of fish fin"
underneath "Colourful eyes" and "Skin the colour of milk" underneath
"Colourful skin". It might make it better if it is that way.
You might wanna show what the meaning is, I don't understand, is it about
colours or something else? It is just a little confusing.