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Anne alone

by vampricone6783

*This is about my OC. It would help if you read “The origin of Vampricone6783” and “Vampricone6783 does not like to be bothered…” before you read this. Gacha Club character designs are on my wall. Enjoy!*

Anne stared at the circus tent.

It’s cloth was torn. It’s white stripes were yellow.

But it was her home.

Her home for now, at least.

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639 Reviews

Points: 77074
Reviews: 639

Sun Mar 26, 2023 11:59 pm
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RandomTalks wrote a review...

Hi vampricone!

RandomTalks here with a short review!

I haven't read the previous parts so I am basing this completely on this single piece. I apologize beforehand if I get something wrong!

This reads more like a poem to me than a prose, especially with the way you have structured your sentences - they convey an almost somber poetic effect which lasts even after reading the poem. The "its cloth was torn, its white stripes were yellow" suggests the passage of time and implies that even though it was not perfect, it still held a special place in her heart. I liked how you claimed that it was her home, and then clarified by adding 'at least for now.' Somehow that adds an even more somber vibe as it makes us wonder why she lacks the stability of her home and why she is going to lose it in some time.

I am not sure if I interpreted this correctly! But I like how it runs along your usual themes with the setting of a circus!

That's all!

Keep writing and have a great day/night!

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100 Reviews

Points: 618
Reviews: 100

Sun Mar 26, 2023 10:55 pm
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tatteredbones wrote a review...

Hello Vampricone! It's gem here leaving you yet another review Haha!

This piece says a lot without dialogue! And usually, at least with the works of yours I have read in the past, you are pretty reliant on dialogue, so I think this was a very interesting and good experiment for you! This piece was relatively short however and felt much more like a prologue to a larger story part. It definitely has me curious for what is to come in the future! This was very interesting the character seems almost nomadic with their plans of moving homes, perhaps the character instead wants to fix up the home? I'm very curious XD!

Keep writing!

This is gem signing off!

gem- he/him~

You can't blame the writer for what the characters say.
— Truman Capote