This is an interesting idea! I think the poem didn't really flow, but it all links back to you which is nice. Is this really about you, because it seems like your really criticizing yourself:
Torn between two sides of herself
Obediently disobeying the rules
It's always difficult to admit your own faults, so if this truly is about you then good job. I think my favourite line is the first one because it makes me think of the thoughts behind your eyes(which is probably what it's supposed to be?).
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