Drip Drop

by tokipie

Published December 5, 2007

Hi! This is my first poem here...

Comments & reviews · 7
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tokipie
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tokipie commented Comment · Dec 8, 2007

Oh! Mesh, I forgot to mention that I really liked the right-side-up-and-up-side-down technique! I am seriously considering experimenting with it for my next poem. Thanx!! ^_^

xoxox, toki~

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tokipie
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tokipie commented Comment · Dec 8, 2007

Hi everyone! Thanx so much for the reviews! Now it is time to faithfully proceed with my duties and answer your questions.

Kyte and Swirl Antara: Well, it’s like MadHatter mentioned: as a puddle, it’s a reflection of the poem and, in turn, a repetition of its contents, so the happenings are never-ending because they will always be reflected/repeated. I also like how Meshugenah mentioned that the poem can also be visualized as an eight-figure for its design is that of an eternal path.
Okay… I have a really good analysis of my poem (God, yes, I know… pathetic) but I refrained from posting it because I really want to see what you guys can interpret from my poem. ;)

MadHatter and Meshugenah: Thank you guys so much for your interpretations! ^_^ I love to analyze reader response. You are correct in thinking that the “animal” is caged, but aren’t humans animals as well? So the poem can twist from the image of a caged animal to that of a caged person, which would also add a psychological twist to the poem—think of the development of the individual’s actions… ok, I’ll stop now!

****P.S.: I’m sorry if I’m not answering your questions directly or completely, but although I do have my own interpretation(s), I’d love to hear others’ reactions, interpretations, and opinions to my poems. Constructive criticism is appreciated. :D

:smt111 love ya all!! xoxox, toki :smt109

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Meshugenah
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Meshugenah wrote a review Review · Dec 7, 2007

That's awesome! It's a visual poem! It looks like an X, or a figure eight pattern, like pacing!

That said, why "drip drop" as the repeated phrase? I mean, if it's an animal pacing, or anyone, for that matter, you can use a whole slew of repeated sounds and motions -- crack, drip, slam, ping, etc.

I'm not entirely sure what your vision is with this piece -- I see the image, and I see the imagery as a caged animal pacing, but what else? Why the reflection of the poem? It's a cool technique to be sure, but what purpose does it serve? You easily could have done that by just writing it right-side-up and still upside down... er, does that make sense? Like this...

silence ... drip drop drip...
Drop.
Dead.
Dead.
Drop
...drip drop drop... silence.

Anyway! That's all form me.

Mesh

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Swirl Antara
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Swirl Antara commented Comment · Dec 7, 2007

this is interesting and appealing to see.....but I have absolutley no clue what it's about.

And why is it upside down?

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MadHatter
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MadHatter commented Comment · Dec 7, 2007

It was good. It was about a caged animal isn't it? It was a little hard to follow, but okay.

Kyte>> Notice it said Drip Drop? The upside down poem is most likely the reflection in the puddle.

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Stori
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Stori commented Comment · Dec 6, 2007

How come you turned it upside down?



Oh, Brightlord Tumul! How unexpected it is to see you standing there! I didn't mean to insult your stupidity. Really, it's quite spectacular and worthy of much praise.
— Wit (The Way of Kings by Brandon Sanderson)