You shall be forever in my heart. Nothing and no one can change that, our bond is stronger, there is no way of breaking it...
Except, I wish there were, I yearn for something different, to be free. He is the only one holding me back. What if you don't want to be with your soulmate? What if Fate made a mistake an you are stuck in the arms of a stranger for the rest of eternity?
There will be no saviour, life doesn't have time to fix every problem it comes across, some will just have to stay. I know that we were drawn towards each other, that we cannot bear to be apart for even a minute, but I do not love him, nor does he love me in return. On occasions we are fueled by dispassion for one another yet completly unable to do any damage.
But then maybe it is me who is holding back, maybe knowing that even if i do escape this unwilling fate, there will nothing left for me. I could pass by The One and not realise it, feel nothing, never experience true love.
If I leave my soul will indefinitly break in two, but my heart will remain intact, broken on the inside.
He shall forever be in my heart, untill we depart.
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138,303 Literary Works • 672,100 Reviews
I really liked this, seriously, it was so... different... It was new, it was romantic but it wasn't... great job.
However, I can't say I see eye to eye with you... I mean, it's just hard for me to understand... they're drawn together, they're soulmates, but they don't love each other? Or she doesn't love him? I would get it if, like, they were in love, but she stopped loving him... that's sort of what happened with my mom and dad... Is this something going on in your life? Or is it something that came to you?
It really is intruiging... I'd like it if there was more to it, but it's good the way it is too, so, once again, great job!
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Tabby
Well the interesting thing is, that i loved this poem because of how much i hated it! I hated how spot on you were to the fears i experience. I hated how you saw right through me. I hated how you pierced my inner sanctum of thoughts where i allow no one who doesn't deserve it. I hated how you made me emotionally recognize the spiritual fears I have. I hated how well you could write at such a young age, leaving me jealous.
I love this. Keep it up. I would edit and fix the errors that are listed above, but besides that it was excellent.
It was my pleasure to read. Thank you,
TmB317
First off, I enjoyed reading this. It was good enough to make me want to keep reading, and it was a spin on the average stuff you get on the romantic board.
There were a few minor mistakes I could see, such as-
"drawn towards eachother," I'm guessing you mean "each other"?
"I could pass by The One and not realise it" I think the correct spelling is "realize". I'm pretty sure realise spelled that way means something different from what you're hoping it means.
Also, I wasn't completely sure I was interpreting this correctly. In my head, it seemed to be about two people, being narrated by a girl, and she likes he husband/significant other/friend but she doesn't love him. I was kind of thinking maybe they were married or something, and when you're married, you have to be with your spouse. So the girl really just isn't feeling it anymore, or maybe she wants someone else. But either way, she doesn't want to get divorced or whatever the case maybe, so she's stuck with this guy. And maybe she walked into the relationship without thinking, but now she's married the guy, so she's stuck. And she never really, truly "experienced true love". I hope I'm interpreting it correctly.
But like I said, I enjoyed reading. Keep writing!