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Young Writers Society



My Civil Thoughts

by thebookworm


I remember the days of my youth. You see I am an old man now. I was foolish then, unwise. I was headstrong and thought I deserved to be King of the World. I was that way until I met them. Ah, yes. Them. Now listen closely, for I wish to tell you my story and my encounter with them.

It was during the end of the Civil War. I inherited from my father a slave powered tobacco plantation in Virginia. I therefore wanted the Confederates to win and keep slavery in America. I would have lost all my money, of which I had plenty.

My family and I lived in a mansion on our property. We had slaves that did our housework and cooking. I had a wife named Rosemary. Rosemary had started a Ban Slavery Association, which she called BSA. She was being silly. Rosemary didn’t understand that the slaves made the tobacco that I sold to feed us and give us a wonderful home. No, she didn’t understand at all.

We had three children. Two boys and one girl. My two twin boys at the age of three were named Robert and Jackson because of the famous Confederate generals Robert E. Lee and “Stonewall” Jackson. I tried to get Rosemary to name our daughter Lee, but she named her Martha.

One early morning I was sitting on the terrace of our mansion, smoking my pipe (with my own tobacco) and watching my slaves begin to work. It was dawn so Rosemary and the children weren’t up. I usually worked the slaves from dawn to dusk.

I felt so royal sitting up there. Not a speck of humbleness was in me. I was pleased. I had a wife, children, a mansion, plenty of money, a tobacco plantation full of slaves and I could hear the roar of cannons and artillery in the distance. I was positive the Confederates were giving the Union a good, large whooping. What else could I possibly want?

I was thinking these contented thoughts when I heard someone approach. Two young men, covered in soot, ash and mud stood before me. You could dimly make out the gray uniform of the South and the blue uniform of the North. “What do you want?” I questioned.

The one in the blue stepped forward. “Sir, we come from the skirmish a few miles yonder. We came to ask you a question.” The young soldier replied. “Well, spit it out boy. What have you got to say?” I prodded him.

He asked,” Sir, do you believe in liberty, justice, freedom and most importantly equality? Or do you believe in bondage?”

The Confederate had a smug look on his face. As if he knew, he was winning. But winning in what? I had no clue. I didn’t know the answer to the boy from the Union. So I replied,” I don’t know. Come back later and you shall have my answer.”

The smug look was gone from his face. I realized he wanted me to answer now and pick what he wanted. I was pondering his young soldier in gray, when another young man appeared. I realized the two young men were now gone, as if whisked away by some invisible magician. This new fellow wore the blue of the Union and had several medals pinned to his uniform. He had long brown hair pulled back neatly into a ponytail that was braided with elegant ribbons. I did not get the other two’s names so I asked of his. He answered,” My name is Justice. For those who do wrong get punished and those who do right are rewarded.”

Justice was wise for his years. Much wiser than I, even though I was a few years older. As I reflect on it now, I believe that he was wise because he believed in liberty for all unlike I did.

Justice’s sharp blue eyes held more knowledge and power than I could ever imagine in one person alone. I thought myself capable of being King of the World! How much more mislead could I be?

I heard more footsteps, but they were lighter, more graceful. It was a woman. An African American woman. I watched as Justice pulled her to him and lightly kiss her on the head.

“This is my wife, Freedom.’ Justice stated. Freedom had her black hair pulled back into a tight bun. Though she wore the rags of a slave, Freedom radiated power not unlike her husband.

“I bring peace and tranquility to those who need it. And you Henry Barsh need it.’ Freedom whispered. Even though she whispered it, what she said rang in my ears. “And you, Henry Barsh, need it.’ How did she know my name? What did she mean by that? I was very peaceful. These thoughts raced through my head.

Then a young child stepped out from behind her parents. Her body was divided in half! One half was white the other black. In a loud voice she said,” My name is Equality. For all men are equal no matter their color or race.”

I was on my knees now holding Equality’s small hand in mine. She reminded me so much of Martha. I couldn’t believe that I wanted to enslave people, enslave this poor little girl and her mother. Own them as if they were property.

Suddenly they were gone. I was looking for them when, two pairs of footsteps approached me. It was the two soldiers. “Before you speak, give me your name.” I ordered.

“My name is Bondage; that’s Liberty.” The gray soldier remarked. Liberty stepped up and said,’ Sir, do you believe in liberty, justice, freedom, and most importantly equality? Or do you believe in bondage?”

“What did we fight for in the American Revolution?” I questioned, “We fought for freedom of Britain! We fought for our liberty, for our justice! We fight for the same thing now, but equality is involved. We fight against bondage and slavery! You there, you filthy Confederate, you fight for bondage and slavery! So be gone you fool! The war is soon over and the Union will win! Go back to your farms full of slaves and torture them one last time!

“I believe in all things good! I believe in liberty, justice, freedom, and most importantly equality! I do not believe in bondage!” I answered maybe just a tad enthusiastic.

Unexpectedly, I heard my wife calling. I blinked my eyes open. It was almost eight o’clock. I must have dosed off. “Coming Rosie!” I called back. But first, I had something to do.

Liberty and Bondage had left and I called down to my men watching my slaves, “Set them all free! Give them all plenty of money! Give them all plenty of food and certificates saying they are free men of the Union! They stared at me for a couple seconds, and then realized I wasn’t joking around. The slaves, free men of the Union, cheered for their freedom.

In the next month, General Robert E. Lee surrendered. I rejoiced. I invited all my former slaves to come to a large celebration.

I have now related my events of my youth. You have learned about them. I now retire, as my tale has been told. Remember it and don’t make the same mistake as I did.

Liberty, Justice, Freedom, Equality (and definitely not bondage) For All!


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User avatar
37 Reviews


Points: 3404
Reviews: 37

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Sat Mar 10, 2012 8:51 pm
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ShootingStars wrote a review...



Hey, Bookworm! This is Shooting Stars like you requested! I'm sorry to say this, but this review will have to be short because I haven to leave soon! Sorry!

1. There are a few grammar and punctuational errors spread throughout the story, especially in the conversations.

2. The paragraph spacing isn't far enough apart so it seems to be one blocky passage.

3. I liked how you stayed true to your character in his opinions and just the way he talked.

4. I enjoyed the ending, and even giggled at it. I liked how you closed your story.

Again, I'm sorry it's short, but keep going!
---Shooting Stars




thebookworm says...


That's okay. I haven't worked on it yet. I need to, I'm just so busy!



User avatar
46 Reviews


Points: 240
Reviews: 46

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Thu Mar 08, 2012 5:51 am
emilybrodo wrote a review...



Hello, Em here with the review.

Grammar and spelling:

‘Ah, yes. Them.’ Should more likely be, ‘Ah yes, them,’ of course if you had it that way on purpose and that’s your style of writing that’s ok.

‘We had three children; two boys and one girl.’ Or, ‘We had three children, two boys and one girl.’ Not ‘We had three children. Two boys and one girl.’ I’m not sure which is more correct. Sorry. It’s just that ‘two boys and one girl’ doesn’t work as its own sentence.

When you say, ‘ “Well spit it out boy. What have you got to say?”’ this should be a new paragraph, or line, because when there is a new speaker there is always a new paragraph for that speaker.

This should be, ‘He asked, “Sir, do you believe in…’ not ‘He asked,” Sir, do you believe in…’

‘So I replied, “I don’t know. Come back later…’ not, ‘So I replied,” I don’t know. Come back later…’

‘He answered, “My name is Justice.’ Not, ‘He answered,” My name is Justice.’

‘Justice was wise for his years, much wiser then I, even though…’ not, ‘Justice was wise for his years. Much wiser then I, even though…’

‘“This is my wife, Freedom,” Justice stated.’ Not, ‘“This is my wife, Freedom.’ Justice stated.’

‘Tranquility,’ should be spelt, ‘tranquillity.’

‘And you, Henry Barsh, need it.” Not, ‘And you Henry Barsh need it.’ ‘

‘ “Before you speak, give me your name,” I ordered.’ Not, ‘ “Before you speak, give me your name.” I ordered.

‘Liberty stepped up and said, “Sir, do you…’ not ‘Liberty stepped up and said,’ Sir, do you…’

‘free men of the Union!” They stared at me for…’ not ‘free men of the Union! They stared at me for…’

Ok, now for what I thought.

You could add more description of the farm or something, but I think this is a nice length anyway.

Your idea was very creative. Putting justice, freedom and equality was a great idea, and then making them into a family was even better. I was thinking that maybe you could have some bad parts of bondage put into people too just to show how wrong they are.

It has a good message about it. Nice job!

From Em, XD




thebookworm says...


thank you. I will work on it shortly!




Mudwesterner
— BlueAfrica