Hello!
I'm so happy to have stumbled over this. I enjoyed reading this so much, and I really hope you post more! (And if you do, totally let me know!!) I have such a love of fantasy, and this is not only a fantasy piece, but it reflects the enchanting side of fantasy. The beautiful mystique that surrounds magic and the unknown.
You also hint at so much potential background! There's clearly a lot of lore buried beneath this concept, which should be so exciting for you to dive into and explore. The history of magic, the opinion of magic today and why her grandparents have differing opinions on it, the history of her grandparents, her own personal history, this elder ceremony and the culture of their home -- there' SO MUCH that you tease here in such a short amount of space, and that's probably half the fun of reading this! We start out with so much intrigue right from the get-go, and that's an awesome hook for your reader!
I love that you use 2nd person narration here. This is such a fun concept that very few people dive into (including myself), but I definitely enjoyed it and felt like I was actually there. I feel like 2nd person really allows for the reader to get really emotionally invested real quick and seems to almost heighten their sensory abilities while reading, and that really helps with the style you have here. It aids the feeling of awe and wonder that your MC has in the world of magic. Since it IS in 2nd person, I'd probably recommend replacing Grandfather and Grandmother with the actual titles the MC addresses them as, since this POV makes the characters much more personal. So Grandfather will be Grandpa and Grandmother would be Nanny. If it was 3rd person, it makes more sense to use generic titles in the narration, but the purpose of 2nd person, I think, is to make it more personal to the reader. In this case, Grandpa and Nanny are the reader's grandparents, and they would call them Grandpa and Nanny. Hopefully that makes sense.
I don't have much more to add. I just really want to emphasize how much I adored this concept of yours! It's such a fun and beautiful idea, and with the amount of history that's already hidden in just this small piece of story, I think you could have a huge fantasy story in your hands. I hope you have fun planning and writing this one as much as I had fun reading!
Keep writing!!
Jabber, the One and Only!
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