Hey gem! Incoming review!
I like the overall message of the poem about doing something yourself to make things better. It's very powerful in the way you put it. Your use of analogies and figurative language is stunning!
I love that line. The visual representation of tears blurring vision is beautiful. I also like how punctuation and capitalization are not used throughout the poem until the very last line as if to say things are becoming more correct or like it should be.blink away those tears every time they try to claim your vision
Some things I would like to suggest is to make your pacing of the first stanza a little more put together. The longer 4th line threw off the balance and made the rhythm seem off kilter. Maybe you could shorten the first part to be something more like, "It shone a light on my darkness..." One other thing I say was this line,
I don't know if you worded it correctly or if I just don't understand the sentence. The sentence overall has a great impact on the poem but I just think there was a grammatical error.there is very little medicine can do if you and it dont work together
I love this poem and your writing! I'll try to make time to review your works some more! Keep writing and I really do mean that! Anyway byeeeeeeeee<3
Points: 12987
Reviews: 185
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