Published July 12, 2008
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141,381 Literary Works • 674,386 Reviews
**LOCKED** because... there's no story anymore.
-:pirate3:
Thanks for the help and i actually have ten chapters written! and i have not even tried to proofread yet! I want to finish and then flush out the ideas and such.
Greetings,
Overall this piece had quite a few punctuation errors which somewhat seemed to cover the essence of the story you were trying to convey. The beginning was very interesting, a rural location next to a top secret FBI area and in my opinion, it certainly has potential, as does any piece of writing, but only if you want to keep working hard on it and refine it your initial idea(s). Some tips would be to flush out the details and characters in planning and to keep on writing. The more you read and write the better your work will become although with only a couple of punctuation errors, that distance is quite near.
Quite good as it helped me get a feel for the dialogue, although use this style sparingly.
Hope this letter helps, if not just delete it!
Sincerely,
-Elitehusky
oops i am sorry i did not knoew all of this!
Hi and welcome to YWS!
It's not a very good policy to put a poll on your work. It Just Isn't Done.
While that is an unwrit rule, one of the writ ones is that you must review at least two other stories before you post any of your own. Try to review more stories than you post on here, sa? It makes people like you.
PM me if you have any other questions about the site, and keep writing!