z

Young Writers Society


E - Everyone

looking at space universe

by superboythealien


My human body walks on earth i look at the sky and at each building and all the birds flying in the sky while i walk on a high building and realise how big a effort the deity is about space as i feel my tiny human body is within the space of all the universe that how my human body lives on earth i see things here is the things i cannot see now exist far away in the universe in space being celestial bodies and they are now there being a material and celestial thing that the eyes of the deity can see it all like what i see on earth because the deity sees all it creates as seeing exist in beings the deity as seeing ability too.

My human body walks on earth along a high building where the tram drives on and i look up in the sky and feel the huge effort of the deity as i see that this earth all it area of atmosphere and the ground sea then how this earth has a size shape then beyond it is no more earth as it within space a universe that i feel this immense power the deity created all this while i can feel the powers and existence of my soul attached on my human body senses and brain that it feel like has a transfer effect on it to raise me from the dead and live in a body as i am doing now alive that while i looked at the sky and knew the earth has a universe beyond it is the power of effect came in my soul teaching the deity created all this space in the universe then put the earth and heavens and celestial bodies in it that how my soul i sense it in my human body because i receive fantasies what do right and to exist as these ideas and be a body alive eternal as relive when dead is i sense how my soul with my body having all perfect fantasies to realise everything about the deity capability about what i should do and believe and how all the creation has this amount of area with space and all things like worlds and it nature and celestial objects in space while i feel think with my human body features that it make me live and that i sense my soul as it the connection to fantasies imagined and store all my fantasies knowledge to have chance think about the attributes of the deity and how use the creation do my deeds is this all created from the deity to be that this high effect about this fantasy who created all the area and space and things in the universe does exist and is the maker of it that this is how high you made me feel when i looked at the earth air that shows everything in and on it and the planet while i imagine space and how high up in the air is the clouds and air that anything can fall how you have made my body stay on earth surface to do activities and everything be on the surface to use each thing for task and pleasures that the sky high up has a fast falling effect yet my human body not there to feel better while i live and walk on the surface grounds that this effect is felt in my senses while i understand the deity made all this huge universe and all the area that shows the atmosphere and nature in all the space i see on earth that how this all area and goes high up and everywhere and expands into all the universe as space all joined together for all things be is the deity is this big and massive in ability as your divine body made this universe that while am just a tiny human body compared with size of the universe and i have my soul is that as i sense the deity made all the universe that it is massive with all things that you did and can in the massive universe in all it space put each celestial object and thing to create worlds and platforms make a universe and process habitat causes to function life and powers that work everything have it manual what to do made on it physical and power energy form to make a universe have everything as it structure and form on each thing has it ability causes made happen from what it made to be that my tiny human body can feel and sense this massive effect you created to put all things in and float it to position worlds in the universe as my soul is provided have a human body think feel these ideas the massive universe processed invented by a deity and it angelic servants doing it task got this ability from the deity as it invented everything to cause a universe and all knowledge be as all things does a task that has knowledge from it yet all these things comes from the deity invent it be these knowledge doer as a thing made that it like the deity was a being that was connected with all forms that made things and what it can all create and make every form to create all things to know all knowledge and make all be as then it is order it all create a universe as it connected with all forms that has all things to create everything do every cause for deity make anything at it will that it is make everything as it connected with all things and it progressed to make more and every forms make everything in the universe and creation that it the deity allow all forms process all it creates as this start it formulate that the deity was connected with all forms as it created it all be to know and control it all perform the creative process cause a universe all knowledge as the deity is a being that has all knowledge and powers while it has a creation that has all that to do all causes as then things knows what to do and has the structure of forms to do it causes and be what it is as while the creation be is the deity has all powers and knowledge about creation in it body of a deity state as to create it is then be connected with everything the creation made and all the knowledge from it is guide the deity all perfect ideas yet for beings in creation have all perfect ideas need accept them each as it imagined is enter your mind as we another form of being in creation as we made with things to be a soul and eternal form and body we not the same as the deity body alone connected with all causes and process to create a universe and every creation have all knowledge yet we are given all perfect knowledge from the deity as we have ideas what do in life with are body soul and eternal form as can think of all perfection task it does and has in divine and physical worlds to perform each action feeling that it each has a scenario.

I look at the sky and see how high it is that my human body is fall from the sky instead i walk on earth thinking how my soul gives me resurrection after each death to continue use the fantasies feelings the scenarios does that while i see the space has this earth i see exist while out of earth is space has all the universe objects that it made form a deity is that my soul and body does not have the ability create this universe yet i am given a soul and body to see how big the earth is and think beyond this earth is all the universe that this massive space and things in it is created from a deity that how my human body can invent and produce things at work and during help is that the deity surpasses my ability as you work to invent and function all the universe as you design and position it have all angels with powers and celestial spheres and items that do a task function organise and be things in the universe for your own deity body have control over all the universe and what allowed have free will in it because you invented then placed all these beings like angels and things that does task to organise balance the universe and set them in a designated place in the universe that on it body or state has all process of causes do a task for the universe operate and have all causes in it for your deity body be the creator of all creation to have a working organised universe as you put all things in it to act like angels do your will like things that power and allow space be in the universe with things to make everything else be for the universe have every different event and feeling as the feeling for each thing is about what it does and need to be ok or when it affected and being damaged or repaired restoring as the feeling on each thing represents how it did work and look new and conditioned then later was ruined stopped working or died that it feeling can be it does feel it or the state it be for whatever happen on it like impact or causes or process that while it not feel like a body alive it has another way of feeling as it design of structures stop working when broken affected ruined or not given what it require do it task.

The humans animals have ability do task see it please you think how design present each event that you this adventurous inviting at it for us yet are kind offering and action of this has no ability and conscience see are mind states has info thoughts organise the universe celestial stuff and angels continue the universe do each task to nature it help the universe habitat live us that without this conscience of ability since we only know what we do on earth as events is that the deity is conscience and ability of effort to control everything function and causes in the universe since celestial stuff and objects in the universe do a cycle duty like planets float and space has all colourful things be where it is while earth is in this same space rotate to have night day that it does need all colourful objects in space as it orbit with you else where in space like the space need you there to be space with you as the universe need all these things in it to be space that is a universe and space to create everything be in it as other things be all forms create everything give the space a universe creation that are human and animal body conscience cannot see are mind and body perform the universe powers that happen far in it and around us in earth in the nature and atmosphere cycles yet are human body lives to think what do for events and lifestyle among all the cycles and causes the earth and universe has that is performed by the deity conscience and ability as it has a body that does this as it made of all powers while a human body has other powers that are not all powers the deity body has for are human body to think feel and do it aims and human actions then while a human can perceive of lifestyle actions decisions is how the universe exist to float planets and worlds and the universe function organised as earth inside it we active in it alive doing pleasing task is the deity perceives all knowledge to organise function the universe that it mind state does thiis universal principle duty as it need a being that think how controls to cycle causes the universe that it has things beings do this as it from you has the form of these abilities on your presence what you are as all things in the universe need this deity as it created it all be to always allow it be created continue and renew at what end to always have all causes and knowledge continue as all causes and things exist though what of it ended damaged is this give creator a paradise how it knows what things is damage something from what it did and what protect and function it perfect that paradise control everything be with what is perfect causes on it while have all cycles causes to exist the universe as paradise and worlds need all cycle process be a universe give all worlds and have all knowledge perform it task and this from each thing be.


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278 Reviews


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Sun Nov 26, 2017 3:21 pm
LittleLee wrote a review...



Hey!
Alright, I couldn't read the whole thing. It looks VERY monotonous, intimidating, and frankly saying, boring. The topic you took is rather interesting, though, I'll give you that.
Look, you HAVE to fragment it into more paragraphs, or no one is going to read it. And you also simply must punctuate it. There is exactly one full stop in the WHOLE thing, and that's in the end. Maybe this is your style, but you might have to change it, because it looks too dull. I didn't want to read even a bit of it.
The sentences are always getting mixed up, there is a huge amount of grammatical mistakes, and more. This is rather unbearable. Even so, I suggest you try writing more, but shorter, articles and such. Maybe you should get a writing buddy or something to help you improve. If you want, I could help you.




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Sun Nov 26, 2017 2:38 pm
Dulcet wrote a review...



Heya, superboy! I'm a bit late, but welcome to YWS! Since you're relatively new, I'll tell you that if you need more reviews from other people, this forum section is a great place to ask for reviews. The people over there are bound to be helpful.

With that aside, I'm not going to lie; I couldn't sit and read through the entirety of this. There is no punctuation in this whatsoever to separate the sentences in each paragraph, and the paragraphs themselves are so big that it's quite intimidating to potential readers.

If I may be honest, this work could easily be mistaken for a direct Google Translate of an essay or monologue because of the lack of proper sentence structure. It's disappointing because the topic of this is quite an interesting one to explore, and I'd love to read it in its refined form. Space, deities, the unseen of the universe - I'd love to read about someone else's views on those subjects, especially since it seems like you have a lot of unique ideas here.

It's just that those ideas need to be presented in a clearer and cleaner way so that it's easier for your audience to read and understand. Right now, it seems like you've dumped all your ideas onto the page without much care. Take your time and give this the love it deserves.

My suggestion, if you're lost on what to do: look at a few published pieces of written works and study how their sentences and paragraphs are structured. Otherwise, if you want articles and guides about grammar, just ask and I can refer you to some.

If you have any questions, or if anything I said was confusing at all, please tell me. Sincere apologies if I was harsh or not helpful at all. Regardless, I hope you have a nice day. : )




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Thu Nov 16, 2017 11:22 am
Radrook wrote a review...



Wow! That is a heck of an eyesight eater!


Please note that anyone who values his eyesight won't dare tackle such a daunting task. Also, the reader will ask himself why the writer is presenting his work in this way. Is it because the writer doesn't care? Doesn't know better? Only the writer knows. All the reader can do is evade.

To make matters worse it is totally ungrammatical, has run-on sentences and virtually no punctuation.





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