It seems like when I need the most help there is no one, or perhaps I just subconsciously push others away. Perhaps it is irrational to get upset over the commentary of others, however overtime those small meaningless phrases that you push aside accumulate until they become your reality. The phrase's "Your worthless" , "Your stupid", 'your ugly" , "Your a slut" and " your meaningless" , are now engraved in my head. His words echo within me and it terrifies me . It terrifies me how i am no longer terrified of his passive-aggressive mannerisms. I am no longer affected by his constant yelling, his constant blows, and the constant physical and emotional bruises. I've come to learn how to fake a smile with ease. It now seems second nature to pretend to be happy. However, every ounce and a while i break down uncontrollably. The stress kills me. I can never be perfect , nor can i erase the past. It seems like every time I am come close to reach the pinnacle of joy, you find a way to drown me. I have been deprived from the pursuit of happiness.
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125,018 Literary Works • 672,861 Reviews
I think this is your first entry, and let me tell you, it's good. There is a few errors in your grammar, but that can easily be fixed. The emotion is raw, I love it. A lot of people are afraid to put there true emotions down, but I feel the emotion dripping out of this. I want to see more of your writing. your first piece here and you've intrigued me.
Thank you so much , it means a lot to me knowing that I have some talent in this and you have inspired to continue to post my writings
Hey stephanieblue! CHRISSY321 here with a review!
I think that this is really sweet- really. The way you describe, what I think can be the feeling of many scenarios- is awesome! I also think that is great too cause it seems to be your first work on here! There are a few things I would change though...
I think I would have separated certain parts of this into separate sections- instead of have the whole thing in only one paragraph. I would do this with the part where you say the different 'names' that you are called that make you feel the way you do- but is may just be me!
Where you do say the names though, there are a few mistakes. You ably capitalized two of these things, like
" " "Your stupid", 'your ugly" , "Your a slut" and " your meaningless" " "
You need to capitalize all of the beginnings of the 'Yours'. It makes it look a little better!
I think that is all the fixing I have! I think overall that this was great, and filled with emotion! I love the end, and I feel the way you did end it was great! *applauds* Yay!
If you have any comments, tell me! Thanks for sharing!
Thank you too . I will consider all your suggestions in my next writing and I'm sure it will enhance my style and make me a better author.
Glad I was helpful!