Young Writers Society

Your poetic expression beautifully conveys a sense of unity with nature, as you transition between being a bird, fish, and clam. The imagery of soaring, swimming, and the interaction with various elements of the natural world paints a serene and harmonious picture. The poem celebrates the idea of being part of nature, with a sense of belonging and acceptance among the animals, water, and sky. It's a reflective and peaceful piece of writing

review time ^-^

ONE: THINGS I LIKED

Beginning each stanza with I am creates a very distinct rhythm and feel to the poem, and helps make it come together nicely. I also enjoyed the stanza about I am a Bird. Using the saying "so close but so far" in your own words to refrence a bird made that particular stanza very distinct.

TWO: THINGS THAT COULD USE IMPROVEMENT
Nothing really, however it irks me that you capitalized words like River and Luck, however this might just be your writing style. It doesn't irk me that much though.

THREE: CONCLUSION
Overall, a really great poem! Flows well, and utilizes personification and metaphors beautifully.

-TEA (^___^)

Hi there! Welcome to YWS! Lim here with a review.

General Impressions and Interpretation

This is a poem with a light atmosphere and an appreciation towards nature. Actually, I think the speaker, “I”, not just appreciates nature, but also seems to identify with it, saying “I am” the birds, the clams and the fish. The subject seems to be a stretch of time during a person’s bike ride where they feel particularly attuned to their surroundings. I think it’s a particular time/place because of the title, but also because the last lines of the poem imply the speaker leaves the place behind at some point (as opposed to feeling like a bird, clam, etc. all of the time).

Being who I am with no consequence.

Calling see you later to my friends in Nature,

Close to Earth yet so far.
See the Magpies fly.

Soaring along
Not in the Clouds, but below them.

Hi there! I'm reviewing using the YWS S'more Method today!

Hi there! Ellie here for a review! I hope you're doing well. Let's get right into it:

Top Graham Cracker - What I Know

Throughout this poem, you begin with different 'I Am' statements. I love bold statements like this and i enjoy using them in my own poetry, because I feel like it does a good job setting the stage, so to say. This allows readers to really look closely and see what symbolize they can draw out for themselves. I likes gow you used these statements because it allowed me to become a bird, a fish, a clam or one with nature. I grew up in nature, so this poem resonated with me because it brought back fond memories of being small. I love how this poem focuses on nature being accepting and how we can become One. Overall, I love the premise!

Slightly Burnt Marshmallow - Room for Improvements

I am wondering, did you mean to include the dash here?

"-I am a Clam"

Its so hard to find critiques for this beautiful piece! I did notice a couple of times you repeated words like 'swimming'. You follow a pattern of repeating the word 'and' after describing an animal, but if that's what you were going for I see no problem with it!

Chocolate Bar - Highlights of the Piece
I love the emphasis on how you became one with nature. It gives me a sense of peace and security. Like I mentioned earlier, I love nature, so this piece brought back memories that I felt, as you described in this poem, accepted and free.

Closing Graham Cracker - Closing Thoughts
Thank you so much for this lovely poem! Please have a great day <3 I hope to read more of your work!

-Ellie Mae

Just so you know, I inserted the ~ symbol where I meant to leave a blank line. Unfortunately, it wouldn't let me leave a space to separate stanzas, so I decided to use ~ instead.