Young Writers Society

Hi! Ok so I really liked this piece. I enjoyed how your style was like what you were describing for your writing. Like when you said
"as long as one poem

one line

one

word"

I liked how you used this stylistic approach to better your work and make it stand out more. I also noticed this with the lines
"the clock snails on

seconds blurrinto into minutes

minutes blurrinto hours

hours blurrinto a lifetime"

I think that your piece is very good with the stylistic elements. And it makes it interesting to read. I'm not bored by it; it captures the reader.

Overall, I think the language and punctuation you used was simple but elegant. I hope you continue to write poems like this! Can't wait to read more of your work!

-E

Hey! Just for your information before I begin I used to be pretty active on here, but I've been on a long hiatus and am just coming back so sorry if I'm a little rusty Now, for the poem!
I'm just gonna go through this poem chronologically and make some comments and suggestions

Skin prickles from cold

running out on paper I sigh

the clock snails on

seconds blurrinto into minutes

minutes blurrinto hours

hours blurrinto a lifetime are all the "blurrinto"'s intentional. I kinda assumed so when you had three of them and it's blurring the words together but i because of the hesitation it causes I might suggest putting a space in between the two words.

have I written it all?

Has every beautiful phrase

been already written? Those three lines... those are PERFECT. I don't think you'll find a writer who hasn't felt that at some point xD Especially for someone like me who hasn't written in a while it really connected.. Excellent phrases!

Perhaps, this is true

Perhaps, I have nothing more

I can add to this world

words are my medium

yet they hinder me so gain, another excellent relatable thing that most writers if no all, will get.
but, I don't write to create

my writings, create you don't need the comma, and this is an instance where the line breaks don't help you but hinder you. I would suggest putting some of these couplets together like the smiles and song couplet or the ideas and feelings one or both of them just to help with rhythm.

they pull smiles onto faces

and place songs into hearts

they evoke ideas

and invoke feelings

as long as one poem

one line good effect with the shrinking lines although it's not entirely original. I feel like the way the poem is going you just don't need that effect for this, but it's your choice.

one

word

can create that,

my will and my pen

shall never waver. great ending. Sometimes poems like this end on a kinda depressing or sad note so it's nice to see this one end with some determination and positive spirit.

Legacy here for a review.

I noticed that you don't have any stanza breaks. I recommend adding stanza breaks whenever you change the topic slightly.

I like the content; it's something I haven't read like this before.

I noticed that you have "blurinto" and it was hard for me to distinguish the two separate words, so keep that in mind.

Overall, nice poem, but it could use some slight work before it is a final draft. Legacy.