Young Writers Society

I have listened to this song before reading and I def would recommend everyone else to, it really elevates the already thought provoking lyrics, I can't gush over sound's musicianship enough lol

I can really feel the yearning here to find truth while in a sea of emotions and thoughts.
And I find the use of contrasting here to really frame what matters to you most,
and expressing the vanity of these things really highlights the desire to improve where you feel real change comes from, even if it's harder than just playing pretend, and you're not quite sure how you'll make it, but it's so better than living in a lie you create for yourself to escape reality, which only offsets the pain to come as a result of hiding.

I'm trying to live for something bigger than me
and my emotions
but it's so hard cause I lose sight of these things
so easily

I'm tired of these self-help books
all the life updates and pictures you took
can’t keep faking all these little lies
keeping up this thin disguise

Hi soundofmind!

RandomTalks here with a short review!

I am really inexperienced at this so I apologize beforehand if this doesn't come across as very detailed or helpful!

But let me just begin by saying that you have an amazing voice! I am listening to the song right now as I am writing this review and I have to say, reading the words and listening to them being sung with proper rhythm and music was an altogether different experience.

I like how your singing made this an even more personal experience. The lyrics were an emotion, and it felt as though we were getting a very private and intimate look into the mind of the writer. We, as the listeners probably do not understand where she is coming from, but we are able to experience the feeling and the emotion she is trying to communicate with us.

From the very beginning of the song, I got the sense that this person has experienced a great tragedy in life and now she is trying to build her life around it. At first, she talks of theorizing and rationalizing and learning to be some version of herself that can still exist despite everything.

reason away the sadness, all the time
it's unsustainable, there’s a deeper cry
a need to be known a need to be seen
it’s just a human thing

I'm tired of philosophies
explained by old men with degrees
I find this heartache comforting
though their wisdom disagrees


Someone overcoming grief and not wanting to find their way out. They shut out others to stay in their hole of depression, waiting for it to consume them whole.


I can theorize my way to hell
doesn't matter if they wish me well
I can learn how to “be”
just between you and me


Someone who has given up in life. Someone who hopes no one drags them out of the hole they're in.


I'm trying to live for something bigger than me
and my emotions
but it's so hard cause I lose sight of these things
so easily


Someone who has tried to do their best, but their best was never enough. They tried to measure up but they never did. And now they've given up.


I'm tired of these self-help books
all the life updates and pictures you took
can’t keep faking all these little lies
keeping up this thin disguise


They've been pretending to be happy this entire time and they are sick and tired of it. They just want to be truly happy for one day but they feel like it will never come.


reason away the sadness, all the time
it's unsustainable, there’s a deeper cry
a need to be known a need to be seen
it’s just a human thing


Someone who wants to express how they feel but they simply don't know how to. Imagine hiding behind a mask and being unable to take it off.


I'm trying to live for something bigger than me
and my emotions
but it's so hard cause I lose sight of these things
so easily


The last section is tied back to the title. They're trying so hard, but it never seems to be enough.

A piece of advice: Try to capitalize the beginning of a new paragraph.

Overall: Excellent work!

So good.

G'day, Soundofmind. Coming here right after your song "Out of my league" .

Your singing of these lyrics feels a whole grade more personal and, at the same time, pleasant to the ears. The variation of guitar chords between stanzas and their messages is well suited, I was pulled in enough to be alarmed that I've already reached the end of singing without having enough attention left to actually review the way the lyrics are written.

As before, please pardon my attempt, but I have a few points here as well I wonder if they could sound better with a few tweaks.

The first stanza is a real great way to pull in, I can't help however but to imagine an "even" before "though their wisdom disagrees". When I tried singing it in your manner in mind, the emphasis on the fact their wisdom disagrees felt more emotionally profound.

In the third stanza, the switch of rhythm is amazing. My wonder here is if your breath-in and follow-up wouldn't sound better with "it's so hard for me when I lose sight of these things". I have this feeling that the "but" doesn't really leverage your voice range and emphasis when compared to how you manage to pull off the words around it.

In fourth stanza, last two verses seem forced, both writing-wise and singing-wise. Fifth stanza has this one point that is an immersion breaker in my opinion, the pause and strong pull on strings at "it's !un!sustainable". In the last verse, I think you could emphasize the message behind it by adding "such" and perhaps singing it with a slight shake of the head, as if coming to terms with something so inevitable.

And that'd be that from me on these lyrics. Once again, thank you for the artistic contribution, I've enjoyed listening to you several times in a row.

Best regards,
Jeremy