What did the cops find in Jeffery Dalhmer's freezer?
Ben and Jerry!
- Dave Barry's Guide to Guys
***
When the third body
high heels and nothing else
tumbled from the freezer
like a waitress out of the kitchen
with a fresh order,
and as the fourth and fifth
lay snug under the floorboards
like peas in a pod,
they were interviewing the next-door neighbor
who had dressed for the occasion
in a tight black evening dress
and exclaimed, that -
How could she have known?,
I mean,
He had mostly kept to himself and
seemed a little shy
but mostly looked perfectly
normal.
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
140,571 Literary Works • 673,516 Reviews
I think I like this. Nice to see a poem that doesn't rhyme for a change. Like the structure of the last few lines with "normal" standng alone but maybe mess with the structure a little more earlier on - it's a little predictable. Maybe throw in some more metaphor as well, if you can, it would make it more memorable.
Mmmm Ben and Jerry's.
Hmm... I know I should have something to say, but I don't. All I have is a "Huh. I like it." So, GJ! (BTW, Dave Barry is awesome!)