When I was a schoolboy, after my exams were over, I used to visit my grandma's house every year. There, I spent a lot of time with her, going to parks, and restaurants, and doing various activities. My grandma always seemed to know what I wanted without me saying a word, and she would buy everything for me.
During one visit, I noticed a boy roughly my age playing football in my grandma's backyard. He lived two blocks from my grandma's house. I approached him and asked if I could join in, and from that day on, whenever I visited my grandma's house, I would play with him. We quickly became good friends.
Over the years, we spent a lot of time together during my visits to my grandma's. We would ride our bikes, go swimming in a nearby stream, and have a great time. During vacations, we would explore and play with other kids, and have our share of mischief like skipping out on payments at a shop and releasing the neighbors' dogs.
As our vacation came to an end, it was always hard to say goodbye to my grandma and my friend, but I always looked forward to our reunions the following year. However, one year, after my vacation ended, my father received a call from my grandma informing us that my friend had been admitted to the hospital with malaria.
My father told me about it, and we planned to visit him, but before we could get there, we received another call from my grandma. The doctor was unable to save him, and he had passed away. I was devastated, and it was a shock to lose someone so close to me. When we reached the hospital, I couldn't believe that I wouldn't see him again. His mother, who saw me as a second son, cried when she saw me, and I couldn't contain my grief. I blamed God for taking my friend away from me, and his loss remains in my thoughts.
I was unable to say a final goodbye to my dear friend, and not being there for him in his final moments still weighs heavily on my heart.
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Oh no! I expected a sad story, but this was really sad.
I kind of expected that the grandma would die from natural causes and then the narrator and the friend would drift apart, which would be . But the friend dying? OUCH. That makes me sad. I'm really hoping that this was simply fiction, though I admit that I wouldn't be surprised if it were nonfiction. 

Anyway, some ideas? One of the things that I would really like to see is more fleshing out of the descriptions. Like, can you describe what your setting is? Where does your grandma live? A city or the country? You describe restaurants and parks, so at first I thought city, but then you described swimming in streams together so I am having a hard time picturing what sort of place. Then you described malaria, which indicates to me that this happened far away from my country (the United States, which doesn't really have malaria).
Anyway, I would love to see more descriptions of the setting just to get a better image in my mind of the place that your narrator grew up.
Also, I would loooove to see some descriptions or stories of your narrator and his friend going on adventures and seeing their friendship, more than the vague description that you offered. That way, I would get a better sense of who your friend was so that I felt like I got a chance to know him too and become friends... if that makes sense?
Anyway, very sad story! If it's nonfiction, I am so sorry for you loss. That hurts.
Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),
Hi! I'm Kate and I'm here to leave a quick review!!
First Impression
Well this was quite a heartbreaking little tale about goodbyes, I wasn't entirely sure what to expect but it really did an amazing job showcasing the terrible emotions that can follow a terrible moment like that.
Anyway let's get right to: Kate's Line by Line Reactions;
Oooh seems like a simple enough start. An innocent little idea of the grandmother' house and a simple friendship starting how a lot of them do in your younger days.
Oh dear. Here I thought we were going to discuss the difficulty that comes with saying goodbye when vacation ends but it looks like things are about to take a much more sinister turn here.
Oh dear well that ended on a truly quite sad note, this poor child losing their best friend and on top of all of that not even really able to properly say goodbye. Truly a tragic end.
Aaand that's it for this oneee!!!
Overall
Overall a really powerful and heartbreaking little story, really tapping into how that friendship has developed and how heartbreaking it is to have to say goodbye and then to not even be able. Very nicely done!
As always remember to: Take what you think was helpful and forget the rest!
Kate
Hi sivasishbora!
Aww, this is such a heartfelt story! I feel like I'm there on one of those summer visits to your grandma’s house, with all the fun and freedom! I can totally picture you and your friend biking around, causing a little mischief, and just enjoying life without a care in the world! That's such a sweet way to remember someone, especially someone who meant the world to you. It's so genuine and from the soul!
When you mentioned how your grandma always knew what you wanted without saying a word, I like that! She was the glue that held all those good memories together. You could really feel that when your friend appeared in the backyard out of nowhere. It feels like fate! He was supposed to be part of those summers with you, but he wouldn't be there without your grandma. She's the foundation.
As for the way things turned, it's tough. The buildup to that phone call about your friend being in the hospital especially! There’s this sinking feeling that creeps in as you read, and then you get the news that he didn’t make it. You feel that shock through your words! You go from sunshine and bike rides to this gray cloud hanging over everything. That just drives the sadness home, even if it hurts!
One thing I think could really strengthen the story is leaning into the emotion more. You mention blaming God, which is such a raw reaction. I wish you went into why you blame God though! If everything around you feels off, say that. If something is missing, say that. It's the little details that make a story come to life. I think that adding that would make the loss feel even more real for someone reading.
But overall, this is so touching! I felt like a kid again when I read this, even though it ended tragically. It's like you wrote childhood innocence perfectly! =D
— Solstice
I clicked on this story because I love the way the title sounded. But damn... This story, although short, is so moving. I don't know if this happened irl, but I can't imagine how painful it must be to lose such a close friend. One second they're next to you, and the next... you'll never see them again. It just goes to show that we should cherish all the moments we're given with our closest ones because life is short and unpredictable: you never know what's going to happen next! This is such a sad story but it's also beautiful. And well written, might I add. I'm so sorry to whoever went or is still going through the loss of a close friend or family member. But, although grief is dreadful, after it, things will ease up and you'll end up with all the happy times you've spent with that person: no one is truly gone until they are completely forgotten.