Even though the pain that seared through her ankle to her mid-leg, Mellanie had the chance to scream at her brother for not driving fast enough (in her brother's 2008 Dodge charger of course!) to the hospital.
"Mells, calm down, i'm going as fast as i can! Maybe if you payed attetention in the woods, we wouldnt be in this mess!" Andrew, or as the family like to call him, Andie, said, not taking his eyes off the road for a second!
Ohkay, so maybe her breaking (or fractured, or whatever) her leg was her fault, but, people dont see a man with a knife and a sack with blood on it in the woods everyday! It was mid-afternoon, around 1-2 p.m, the time Mellanie went bike riding. She just had to look to make sure he wasnt hunting, but at that point her bike ran off a small rock that was big enough to make sure she went toppling into the near-by leaves and rocks down the hill, along with her bike twisted around her feet.
In the car Mellanie kept getting flashes in her mind of the scene, and playing it over and over like a D.V.D player in the space of her skull. She could've sworn the man breifily glanced at her before her big tumble, the one thing she replayed the most. Questions and thoughts rambled through her head, they would have filled a pool.
"What if he saw me with the thing in his sack? If he did, and if that sack was a body, would he try to get me before i tell anyone? But wait, will i tell anyone? Should i? Or will that make the man hunt me down? Maybe i should just stay clear of the woods for a while, but then where else with i be able to bike ride? UGH! I just wish i didnt see what i saw! It would make everything a whole lot easier!"
Just then the car came to a stop, right in front of the Emergency part of the Hospital located in their small town of Montana. Mellanie didnt really know what her town was called, no one really called it anything cause it wasnt much of a town. It was like the middle of nowhere, except for some restops and people in houses. And killers. 
The hospital wasnt much, it was small, but big compared to the other buildings of the small little town. The hospital was made of bricks, red, sorta brown in some areas (although that could be mold or germs or something) and a sliding door in the front. The inside was soo much bigger then the outside, with a little sitting area when you walk in, then you turn right and you start decending down the patients room, passing a little gift shop. Mellanie didnt really know what was on the left side of the hospital, cause for 1, she had never been in that part. The walls started to become white from the floral wallpaper from the sitting area in the front.
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Author Note!!!
heyyy ohkay, well this story is not done yet. so, please dont be like, omg thats the shortest chapter ever! also, please help me make up a name. thank you(:
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125,018 Literary Works • 672,856 Reviews
Hello. I don't want to come off as a stalker but I'm just overly helpful haha! Okay, I'm not sure if you were told, but the main idea of this site is to have two reviews for every post. What this is..haha..is a review. And it may be harsh because I just try to help. It's constructive. If you feel that I am wrong and disagree, just ignore what i say and move one. That goes for anyone that comments on your work. Also, reviewing gets your name out there and gets you points. I'll review your story only because it is short. Short is okay. The longer, the less people will want to read it. Trust me on that one. Okay here we go.
Okay.
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don't
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Wright out numbers.
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This sentence is choppy and awkward to read. Maybe if you reword it, or made it into a few sentences it would make more sense.
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Descending
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Extra 'o'
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This is good! 'Wasn't'
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This is good so far. A few things to watch of for:
Capitalize your 'I's'
You forget the apostrophe in words like 'Don't' or 'Wasn't'
Some of the sentences are a little choppy but it's an easy fix.
Try reading it out loud to see if they make sense.
Hope I was some help. Looking forward to seeing you around.
--Jasmine