Published July 12, 2011
I look around.
There's so many people.
So many strangers.
I count the minutes until I can go home.
Then I see you.
You stand out.
You turn around and look at me.
Our eyes meet and I smile.
You blink and smile back.
My cheeks flush.
Each day I look for you.
When I see you my heart skips a few beats.
You say my name and we walk
Together for hours.
We take our time
Savoring every moment together.
We count each ane every
minute we share.
But our time draws to an end.
It is time to say goodbye.
I walk over to you
With tears streaming down my face.
You wrap me in your arms.
You lift me off the ground.
You spin me around
As I bury my head in your shoulder.
You set me down, but don't let me go.
The others are calling to me.
It really is time to say goodbye.
I lift my head and gently
Touch my lips to your cheek.
I can't bear it any longer.
I turn to leave.
As I drive away
I watch you get smaller and smaller.
I cover my face with my hands
And begin to count the minutes
Until I can see you again.
I love you.
Wait for me.
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140,946 Literary Works • 673,776 Reviews
Thank you both very much for your criticisms, I really appreciate them! @MamaLama95 I agree about the stop-and-starty lines....I'll definitely work on that! @Deanie thank you very much. This poem is about my boyfriend and I, and I think it really expresses how our love first blossomed...thanks again!
This poem is so sweet! I find it really cute and I love how the counting the minutes until they see each other really makes you notice how strong their love is. I love the ending, it sums it all up really well. I can't see anything wrong with this poem, but there was one little spelling mistake
I think you mean 'we count each and every'
But apart from that, awesome poem and keep on writing!!!
Very touching, bittersweet - I quite liked this, except in the first ten liens or so, the fact that you use full stops after every line made it too stop-and-starty, which took away from the charm of the poem and made it a little difficult to read properly. Apart from that nit pick, it was quite good, and I'll keep a lookout for your work.