Young Writers Society

When I first began reading your poem, I was really excited, and my expectations for the poem started to grow; however, as the piece progressed, I became frustrated with the lack of clarity in the plot. Of course, straightforward plot is not a requirement in poetry, but the frenzied structure of the plot confused me. I suggest that you revise the poem after the first sentence, and make the writing a bit more concise - "showing" more and "telling" less. And you should either capitalize "i" or make the reason why "i" isn't capitalized clearer to the reader because as of right now, it confuses me. Keep up the good work!

thanks

It was good. but I did find a few mistakes. Like the way you never capitalized I. But it was obvious that you did that one on purpose so I don't know if it could be counted as a mistake. But anyways,

nor to protect me.

their revenge.

which it is my