What is music?
It is the secret musings
Of the emotions in our hearts;
Whose beauty and perplexity
Are too profound for words.
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Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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125,021 Literary Works • 672,740 Reviews
Hi secretrose, and if I haven't said it already, welcome to the Young Writers Society, I hope you are enjoying the site so far.
So this was an interesting, and short sentiment reflecting on just what the meaning or purposes of music is. I think this subject definitely has the opportunity for expansion (maybe in future poems that you write), but it is lovely how it is too.
A few thoughts:
I thought the word play between "music" / "musings" was a bit gimmicky in such a short poem - especially because "secret musings" has about the same meaning as "emotions in our hearts" so it could even be interpreted as being a bit redundant.
I think you could have a more specific description than "beauty" in line 4 -- like what about music or life is beautiful?
I think the last line sums up the poem nicely though - and is actually a bit ironic considering that the poem uses words to try to portray something that can not be communicated in words / that's a nice little twist there.
I found the capital letters at the beggining of each line to be disruptive a bit to the flow, but I did appreciate that it was consistent - so the poem did look clean on the page.
Keep up the nice writing, and let me know if you had any questions about this review!
~alliyah
Hello! I’m here to review this piece! Okay so I really like this it’s short, sweet, but also impactful and it’s something I most likely wouldn’t have thought of. I personally wish you would’ve made it at least a few lines longer, to further explain your point and to give it more of a push. But I guess it’s quality over quantity in this poem
Even though it didn’t rhyme, it still flowed incredibly well. I hope to see you writing more poems, cause you are killin it! (Not literally XD) Well thats about, always keep writing!!
~CAKEEEEE~
Wow!! Hey there @secretrose29, 'Tato here for a review...
I love the simplicity of the way you wrote this poem. Before I jump into the review, I have to say i love your username!! There really is not a lot to say in terms of what you need to fix or change. I love the line that says "Whose beauty and perplexity are too profound for words." As a musician, I know this to be so very true. Music really is "The secret musings of the emotions in our hearts." All I have to say is Great Job!! Have a great day! Hope you write more soon. See you around!!
Hi PoTatOe001, thank you so much for the review!
Anyways, I%u2019m a musician too! Just that I%u2019ve been trained to play classical music since I was young.
What do you play if you don't mind me asking?
Hi, of course I don%u2019t mind you asking! I usually play all kinds of classical music pieces that my music teachers assign me on the violin. I%u2019m now currently playing the Adagio and Fugue of Sonata No.1 in G minor by J.S.Bach; the Fugue is super tricky! I%u2019m also playing the first movement of Mozart%u2019s Concerto No.3 in G major. These are nice pieces; if you listen to the Mozart concerto I recommend you to listen to Hilary Hahn%u2019s video of it on YouTube, her rendition of it is really out of this world.
Wow, secretrose, you really expressed your emotions well, like, really well! In just a few lines, SO MANY EMOTIONS! HOW?! Poets have that talent. Anyways, this is nice, good job, and I see that you joined just a few days ago, welcome to YWS! <3
Thank you Liberty500!
Your welcome