Published January 15, 2011
Every night
interrupt my steady sleep
with thoughts of what now cannot be
memories of what used to be
shattered hopes of what will never be.
Don't you remember
the carnival rides,
that smile I would save just for you,
and your body pressed against mine;
the feeling of skin on skin.
We were stars,
a constellation in the sky.
Set in our place, adamant and fitting.
So tell me,
dear,
how did it end like this?
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138,303 Literary Works • 672,100 Reviews
I really liked this poem
Though I do think that something's missing in between this two lines. what interrupted the steady sleep?
other than that I think the poem was great, really emotional, I definitely felt a connection to it, good work.
I really enjoyed reading this
Just a point-
"So tell me, dear, how did it end like this?"
I felt a bit disappointed by the ending. Probably just me, but it seems like quite a few poems end in this sort of way. It was a great poem, but I feel the ending is lacking a little. Maybe through a punch, a suprise, or that little line or quote thats been banging around in your head?
I really liked the piece though, espically about the stars and constellations. Loverly.
I'm not a big poetry person, but i really like this. It strikes a chord with those who have been through something like that. I dont know if this is based on something you went or are going through but if it is: best of wishes to you.