Pessimists belong in a zoo
Pessimists.
Multiplying like locusts.
That's the only thing pessimists do, they multiply.
Of course, that's not true.
I've met doctors, scientists, poets, jurors
All pessimists in everything they do
But what they do best is convince you
That it's going to suck and you shouldn't have children
Because it's not worth bringing them into this world
That is somehow cursed and evil
Bees dying, trees frying, F.E.M.A.,
"We've only seen the preview,"
And it works, I can see it in all of you
Pessimists, you belong in a zoo.
Let's change the tune, because I'm sick of it
I think you should step back and stop listening
What do you call happiness? Agreeing with popular opinion?
Stop watching O'Reilly, Limbaugh, and get off the Internet
Realize this is not the world you're looking at
It's tunnel vision
You have no idea what life is ahead of you
It's not a game, pre-scripted, C++ coded
Not by anyone, not even your God
It's not written, it's nonfiction
Think about that for five minutes
Without using the words 'purpose' or 'destiny'.
You're alive, and it's not too short
It's longer now than it ever was before
Life expectancy is on the rise,
Except for the voluntary things you do while you ignore
Health is guaranteed unless you're in a poor nation
Which you're not, whatever you saw in the newspaper
Pessimists, you belong in a zoo
Because there's a band out there you've never heard
but you'll listen to them one of these days,
you'll hear them eventually,
and it's like love at the first word
And you'll spend summer going to their concerts
They'll be on tour, they'll blow your mind
And they'll fill your Walkman and you'll listen to them
Even at work
At a job you hate,
And it won't be so bad getting back to the grind
Because there's a guy out there
That guy everyone told you doesn't exist
And he wants to meet you, only you, so bad
That it hurts sometimes
While you're convincing yourself he's not there
He's kicking a can on the sidewalk
He's burned from so many not-you's,
You'll know him from just looking in his eyes
Because you'll get to see the world one day
Yes, you
People do it all the time
English teachers, journalists, athletes
Spies
Your childhood dreams don't have to be a lie
"Life sucks then you die"
I read that on a playground pole when I was 5
And back then, as now
I thought about the stupid person writing it, how he probably thought he was so cool
Pessimists, you belong in a zoo
Because your team might win next year
Because when you think about it, it's okay to have fear
Because you have muscles and they'll get stronger
Because you can laugh out loud at the pier
Because your real friends are out there
Because you can look up a word and be 1% smarter
Because they discovered an algae that can eat radioactivity
Because you can make decisions
Because your heart is beating the drum of your life's mission
Go ahead and cry
If something bad happened
But make up for it in kind
When you do get happy
If it's your friends who brought you down
It's your fault for not ditching them
Do you think you need people
Who don't like living?
Pessimists,
You belong in a zoo.
Where you can entertain us all with your dire prophecies of doom.
This is such a powerful piece, just plain truth! I like it, great title and the content is great - you really forward you message and maybe the structure is a little uneven and the lines differ too much in length accorded to me but, eeh, overall it was quite amazing. I enjoyed the read and nods encourraginly towards the end... the last line I would scratch though. Ending it with "You belong in a Zoo" ties the thing together better I think.
4/5 ickie stickie spiders to you!
Good Luck & Keep Writing
// Demoness
Hi. First of all, I love the title, it's catchy. Second, the I loved the whole poem. Especially the repetition of,
Other than that, I couldn't take my eyes of the poem for one second. It was so entertaining and interesting. The thing I liked best about it was the very last paragraph. Each line starts with 'Because'. It was a good idea. You're an awsome poet. Can't really find any faults
Upon reflection, one might find that they already are.
I guess I misunderstood the concept of slam poetry, but this one is very cool. I really liked the uniqueness of the whole poem. The whole idea behind it was very creative and original, so propos to you there. The length is something that not all people appreciate, but it is very impressive, if also a little daunting. But never shy away from the long poems, 'cause they can be really interesting to read! Keep it up!
Hi there!
When I first looked at this, I was wondering how you made it work. It looked very long and the lines seemed to be too long to accomplish anything. But then I read the spoiler and I realized what this was going to be used for. I think this is a perfect piece for a slam. I have honestly never been to a slam (although I really want to see one), but I have heard someone slam poetry. This is definitely the kind of piece that you could read at a poetry slam.
There's a lot of emotion in this and because of the longer lines and stanzas, you can really get into it. With so many syllables in one line, you have a lot of great words you can put the emphasis on. The poem flows very well and sounds great when read aloud (which I did). Your grammer and spelling is good too, so no worries there. There's not really any chance for you to have imagery in this, but I still see everything that you're mentioning.
Here's just a couple things I had to say about this. Corrections are in bold:
This sentence sounded awkward when I read through it. It seemed like you were telling your audience to stop listening to the poem. I think you should be more specific and say who you want them to stop listeneing to.
I think this line sounds better without the word 'like' in it.
This was my favorite part of the whole poem. I like how you took what a pessimist might think and turned it around. Very powerful.
Again, this was a great piece. I enjoyed reading it. Keep writing!