Hey, so this is my first official post on YWS! Yay! I write a lot of poetry, and this is the most recent I've written (after a long absence from writing) so I was really excited when I finished. I'm pretty proud of this piece because it's so different from what I normally write (which you will see at some point 
). Anyway, here it is and I hope you enjoy it.
PS--This piece is also on my blog http://www.dailyraz.blogspot.com so you should check it out there to see the reflection/reason behind it and some other stuff I've posted!
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Canary word: Present
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125,006 Literary Works • 672,809 Reviews
Thanks so much to all of you! Your reviews mean a lot to me and hopefully I'll be able to incorporate all that you've said in my future writing :]
Thanks again.
(I'm not an amazing poet, so don't take my review too seriously!)
Anyway, overall, I loved it!
Heya
I'm here to review as requested. I'm not the best at reviewing poetry so I might not be able to give this a very good critique. I'll try my best though.
#FF0000 ">Red = Negatives/corrections
#0000FF ">Blue = Things I like
Bold = My comments/suggestions
Overall
Although I did find some negatives in this, I also found a lot of positives. When it comes down to it, I rather liked this poem. What I liked best about it, I think, is actually the idea of it. I've seen a few poems about writing itself before and I must say, yours is one of my favourites. After reading this, I can tell that you clearly have potential. Another thing that I liked about this is the way that you shaped the poem itself. I like the way you centred it and varied your line lengths. You haven't kept it boring and simple, you've been a bit more quirky when it comes to the structure of this. Having a good structure is important because that is one of the things that draws your readers into actually reading your poem. When it comes to your grammar, you didn't have any besides the last line. I can't stress you enough about how important grammar is, whether it's a poem, story, article, essay, whatever. Your spelling, on the other hand, was very good. I didn't find a single misspelled word. The same goes for your vocabulary, you didn't just use boring, everyday words. Although sometimes, it did feel a bit repetitive.
That's kind of like my main critique, come to think of it. Although this poem was well written and descriptive, it felt as though you were describing the same thing over and over again. You were describing how amazing writing is and how great it makes you feel. Describing this is fine, it's just that it was all that you were really describing. For example, you don't really have much imagery in this. There weren't any real metaphors, personifications, simile's or anything like that. To me, the imagery in a poem is very important. By creating good, effective imagery, you help make the reader fell true emotions. Describing feelings is fine as long as you balance them out with descriptions of everything else. This may sound weird, but you could describe how the ink scribbled onto a page looks so perfect and elegant. You would obviously come up with a better description by using a simile or something, but you get the idea. Do you understand what I'm trying to say here? Repetition is fine as long as you don't overuse it.
My only other real critique for this is the grammar. Like I said before, you didn't actually use any grammatical marks until the very end. Well, you used question marks at one point, come to think of it. You didn't use any commas and only one period in the entire poem. What many writers don't know is the fact that the grammar in a poem is exactly the same as the grammar in any other piece of writing. When a sentence ends, you must finish it with a period and when you need a breath during a sentence, you use a comma e.t.c. Another thing that I noticed you doing when it comes to the grammar is the fact that you started every line with a capital letter. Like I've just said, the grammar in a poem is exactly the same as the grammar in any other piece of writing. You only need a capital letter after a period or when the piece of writing actually begins.
Negatives aside, I did enjoy reading this poem. All that you need to do know is to take into consideration what I've said. After you've done that, you should edit this up a bit. If you do that, you will certainly have a great poem going here.
Keep writing,
xoxo Rhian
I thought this poem was wonderful! I can really empathise with it as I've also taken a long break from writin, still trying to find the inspiration. I thought the imagery was great, everything was just top notch. I hope to see more good poetry. Well done!
-Matt
Razzleberryx,
I can see why you are proud of that peice! It was wonderful, the flow was perfect and the message was one I'm sure every writer can relate to!