Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),
Hi! I'm here to leave a quick review!!
Anyway let's get right to it,
"How long has it been?" Kira heard a voice ask, in a feeble tone, from across the room. At least it sounded like it was coming from across the room; it was pitch black so she couldn't be sure. "Well considering you came in a couple of hours after the rest of us got back from the testing rooms, I'd say about three days." Dillon, Kira's brother, replied. The newest addition to what the Techs referred to as their family began to sob softly upon hearing the reply.
Hmm...well this is a little hard to judge where this is all taking place, but we do get the sense that this is not a very happy occasion by any means and some dangerous situations are potentially going on in the background judging by the general experiments and testing theme that we've got going on here...on top of the general tone of sadness going on with the dialogue here. At any rate, its an interesting start here.
Everyone broke down in one way or another when they first arrived at The Lab. They all got used to it eventually. Kira and Dillon had been imprisoned at The Lab since she was six and he was nine. Now she was seventeen, and he was twenty.
Every day was almost exactly the same. The door would open long enough to get carts in for their meals, and then slam in their faces. The light was on only three times a day. Five minutes for breakfast, ten for lunch, and fifteen for supper. Other than that, they lived in darkness.
OKay...well this paragraph manages to lay out exactly what's going on pretty nicely there, and well the picture that is being painted at the moment is a properly powerful one there...you get the sense that some pretty dangerous things are going down in this area and people being held hostage from as young an age as is described here just raises soo many questions about how all of this might work. These few paragraphs manage to be a pretty powerful hook here for the story.
The only days that were different were testing days. They were taken as a group into one testing room or another. There they were forced to endure cruelties that could sometimes make you lose your lunch.
With the new addition there were ten of them again. Maya, the only person who had been there longer than Kira and Dillon had died in the middle of a test. The Techs were so angry that meals were cancelled for two days.
Well this ending manages to properly cement the attitude of whoever is running the tests here. Its one that extraordinarily cruel tests are being run on children, but to punish them for one of them dying in one of those cruel tests not to mention the fact that these people seem to be able to get a replacement for a child being lost in a test really fast there. Overall, I think this is a pretty powerful scene to kick things off here. You do a pretty good job, this is certainly interesting enough that I'd want to read more here.
Aaaaand that's it for this one.
As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.
Stay Safe
Harry
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Reviews: 4096
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