​One day.

by pavlinasigg

Published December 31, 2014

12+

In The things that crossed my mind twice.

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One day, it’s all gonna be gone.

One day, we’re gonna be thinking

how fast our lives passed by

and we’re probably gonna feel depressed about it.

But, truth is, we are actually here,

right now,

young and alive.

And now is the time to make memories.

These memorable moments,

that one day we’ll remember.

The moments of laughter and soothing silence.

The moments of hot, torturous tears,

for that person that broke our hearts,

but we forgave because -what the hell!-

we are young and we make mistakes.

The moment we had to say "goodbye."

The moments we laid on our beds,

thinking about the future,

like we had a clue.

The moment we drank to much at that party,

and the moment,

we fell asleep on our friend’s shoulder,

because the movie was too bad to watch.

The moment we failed that test.

Ha, who are we kidding?

That happened multipule times.

The moment we stood up,

in front of our whole class,

and read that poem,

and everybody laughed

because they didn’t get it.

But we did, so it’s ok.

The moment we listened to that old song,

and we cried

not really knowing the reason why.

The moments of awkwardly long hugs

that weren’t actually awkward,

because we felt loved.

The moments we said "I love you."

with red, tearful eyes.

We’ll remember.

(I wrote this poem on the 6th of December of 2014 while listening to Bon Iver.)

Comments & reviews · 2
User avatar
steampowered
Review
steampowered wrote a review Review · Dec 31, 2014

As I've said before, I don't tend to review poetry, mainly because I hardly ever write it. However, I was glad I read this. I really enjoyed it, and it's very relatable. The only real errors I noticed were a couple of minor spelling mistakes:

"lifes" should be "lives"

"drunk to much" should be "drank too much"

"to bad to watch" should be "too bad to watch"

"akward" should be "awkward"

Apart from that I thought it was really good, and the opening line was really thought-provoking. I especially liked the repetition of "the moment" and the ending was very powerful. I also liked the way some lines were capitalised and others weren't. Keep up the writing, and I'll try and review more of your poetry if you upload it! :)

Thank you so much for the review!
I didn't notice those little spelling mistakes! oops! :)

User avatar
deleted28
Review
deleted28 wrote a review Review · Dec 31, 2014

Hey, it's TiggaBiscuit here! And I am going to be bringing you a review! So please do sit back and enjoy, personally I loved this poem and there isn't anything I'd do to change it. Personally I think it is perfect however that is me and I am sure that there is something in there that could be improved it just takes a better mind then mine to see what needs to change.

Keep up the good work!!

~Tigga



Love is not an emotion. Love is a promise.
— 12th Doctor